Category: animals

What would you call an Arab who owns a harem of cows?
A milk sheik!

(q.)why did the people name the male whale humpfree?

(a.) because there were no female whales in the ocean that day!

why dont polar bears eat penguins? because they cant take the wrapper off

What’s the easiest way to put a giraffe in a fridge?
By opening the door and putting it in.

Q: What do you call an elephant with a machine gun?
A: Sir.

Q: What do you call an elephant wearing pink earmuffs and a dress?
A: Anything you want, it can’t hear you.

Q: Why do elephants drink so much?
A: To try to forget.

Q: What’s grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow?
A: An elephant rolling down a hill with a daisy in its mouth!

Q: Why did the Elephant stand on the marshmellow?
A: So she wouldn’t fall in the hot chocolate.

Q: How do you get down from an elephant?
A: You don’t, you get down from a duck.

Q: Why is an elephant big, grey, and wrinkly?
A: Because, if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Aspirin.

Q: What’s grey and white on the inside and red on the outside?
A: An inside out elephant.

Q: What’s grey and white on the inside and red and white on the outside?
A: Campbell’s Cream of Elephant soup.

Q: What is grey and not there.
A: No elephants.

What do a walrus and a tupperware container have in common?

They both like tight seals..

A woman is out looking for a pet, and so she’s trying the local pet shops. She
walks into a small pet shop and explains her need to the attendant. He thinks
for a moment and then says, “I’ve got just the thing for you madam. I’ll just
get him.”

With that, he disappears into the back of the shop, and returns a few seconds
later with a cute little puppy. “This dog is a special dog,” he tells her. “It
is able to fly,” he explains, and with that throws the dog into the air. It
immediately begins to float gracefully around the shop.

“There is one problem with him, however. Whenever you say ‘my’, he’ll eat
whatever you’ve mentioned. Watch. “My apple!” The lady watches in astonishment
as the dog zooms over to the shop attendant and furiously devours an apple he
has produced from his pocket.

“He’s cute, and so unusual. I’ll take him,” she says, and a few minutes later
she is on her way back home with dog to show her husband.

“Darling, look what a clever pet I bought today!” she exclaims when she gets
back home. “He can fly!”

The husband peers at the dog, and then remarks, “Fly eh? Ha! My foot!”

What do cows do for fun?
They go to MOO-vies!

Two goldfish were in their tank.
One turns to the other and says,
“You man the guns, I’ll drive.”

Two mice met behind a toaster in a Columbia, Maryland household.”It’s been a long time.” the first said. “How’s everything?” “Great!” the second replied. “I have three brothers in pharmaceutical testing and a sister in heart research!”

A camel and a elephant met annd the elephant said
“Why have u got your boobs over your back””
and the camel replied
“”what a silly Question when u have a dick hanging from your head””

“

Q: What do you call a pig that does karate?
A: Porkchop!