From the Top5 list at http://www.topfive.com12> The danger element seems to be missing in “Stefan Erwin — Lhasa apso Hunter!”11> It’s about your 14-year-old daughter, and appears to have been filmed with a camcorder from your neighbor’s window.10> Narrator can’t keep from giggling during dung beetle mating sequence. 9> “The Making of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze” just barely touches on Vanilla Ice’s role in the movie. 8> Harsh lullaby of the Savanna marred by overhearing Pirates of the Caribbean next door. 7> Dramatic reenactment of The Battle of Midway sullied by shampoo bottles and panty hose hanging from the towel rod. 6> You find yourself wishing another Priceline.com commercial with Bill Shatner singing would come on. 5> “Sensing that danger is lurking near his cubicle, the Top5 contributor minimizes Solitaire on his desktop and reveals his spreadsheet camouflage.” 4> Too much plot and dialogue, not enough hot monkey-love. 3> Sound effects for the battlefield re-enactments consist of Emeril Lagasse shouting “Bam!” repeatedly. 2> “Here, in its natural habitat, the Big Mac seems no more deadly than your average order of fries.” 1> Tonight on the Discovery Channel, John Woo’s “Caterpillars of Fury.”