Author: admin

A man decided that he was going to ride a 10-speed bike from
Phoenix to Flagstaff. He got as far as Black Canyon City before
the mountains justbecame too much and he could go no farther. He
stuck his thumb out, but after 3 hours hadn’t gotten a single
person to stop. Finally, a guy in a Corvette pulled over and
offered him a ride. Of course, the bike wouldn’t fit in the car.
The owner of the Corvette found a piece of rope lying by the
highway and tied it to his bumper.

He tied the other end to the bike and told the man that if he
was going too fast, to honk the horn on his bike and that he
would slow down. Everything went fine for the first 30 miles.
Suddenly, another Corvette blew past them. Not to be outdone,
the Corvette pulling the biketook off after the other. A short
distance down the road, the Corvettes, both going well over 120
mph, blew through a speed trap. The police officer noted the
speeds from his radar gun and radioed to the other officer that
he had two Corvettes headed his way at over 120 mph. He then
relayed, “…and you’re not going to believe this, there is a
guy on a bike honking his horn trying to pass….

25 SIGNS THAT YOU’VE HAD TOO MUCH OF THE HI-TECH AGE1. You just tried to enter your password on the microwave.2. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.3. You call your son’s beeper to let him know it’s time to eat. He emails you back from his bedroom, “What’s for dinner?”4. Your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies via her web site.5. You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but you haven’t spoken with your next door neighbor yet this year.6. You check the ingredients on a can of chicken noodle soup to see if it contains Echinacea.7. You check your blow-dryer to see if it’s Y2K compliant.8. Your grandmother clogs up your e-mail inbox asking you to send her a JPEG file of your newborn so she can create a screen saver.9. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home.10. Every commercial on television has a web-site address at the bottom of the screen.11. You buy a computer and a week later it is out of date and now sells for half the price you paid.12. The concept of using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase is foreign to you.13. Cleaning up the dining room means getting the fast food bags out of the back seat of your car.14. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is that they do not have e-mail addresses.15. You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.16. Your dining room table is now your flat filing cabinet.17. Your idea of being organized is multiple-colored Post-it notes.18. You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.19. You get an extra phone line so you can get phone calls.20. You turn off your Modem and get this awful feeling, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.21. You get up in morning and go online before getting your coffee.22. You wake up at 2am to go to the bathroom and check your E-mail on your way back to bed.23. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :)24. You’re reading this.25. Even worse; you’re going to forward it to someone else.

Salad a firm’s own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the
form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country
people’s fashion.

Two bulls were sitting on a hill, overlooking a herd of heifers below.

The young bull says, “Hey, why don’t we run down there and screw a few of those heifers?”

The old, wise bull shakes his head and says, “Nah, why don’t we walk down there and screw all of them?”

Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman

Este era un lorito muy tir�n, y todos los d�as se cog�a a los animales de la tienda donde se encontraban, hasta que un d�a una se�ora lo decide comprar.

La se�ora ten�a una gata, y todos los d�as al llegar a la casa ve�a a la gata toda exhausta, y dec�a: “Ohhhh se han cogido a la gata”.

As� pas� una semana, hasta que tom� al loro y le dijo: “�Si ma�ana te coges a la gata te encierro en el refrigerador!”

Al d�a siguiente la gata estaba cogida otra vez y la mujer encerr� al loro en el refrigerador. Pasaron tres dias, y se acord� del loro, y cuando abre la puerta del refrigerador ve al loro todo sudado y �ste le dice:

“�CO�O, ESE POLLO SI QUE TIENE EL CULO DURO!”

Yo mama’s so disgusting she got kicked out of red lobster for bringing her own crabs.