there was a kid on a buss and he sayed if my mom was a mommy giraph and my dad was a daddy giraph then i would be a babby giraph. and he sayed this over and over and then the buss dirver says what if you mom was a prostitute and you dad was gay. And the kid replied i’d be a buss driver
Author: admin
I often wonder how come
I often wonder how come John Tesh isn’t as popular a singer as some people
think he should be.
Then, I remember it’s because he sucks.
The Rooster and the Cat
Answer these questions to the best of your ability:
1. How many eyes does a rooster have?
2. How many legs does a rooster have?
3. How many beaks does a rooster have?
4. And finally how many wiskers does a cat have?
OK now that you’ve answered all these questions to the best of
your ability ask yourself this…Why is it you know so much
about cock and nothing about pussy?
Polish Plane Landing
Polish Air Lines flight 113 was descending for a landing at an
airport they had never been to before. The pilot looked out the
windshield and suddenly exclaimed to the copilot, “Holy cow! Look
how short the runway is! I`ve never seen one that short!”
The copilot looked out the windshield. “Wow! you`re right! That`s
incredible! Are you sure we can make it?” “Well we better, were
almost out of fuel.”
So the captain got on the intercom and notified the passengers to
put their heads between their knees and prepare for an emergency
landing. Then he set the flaps to full down and slowed the plane to
just over stall speed. The big jumbo jet came screaming in, on the
ragged edge of control. The pilot`s hands were sweating, the copilot
was praying. They touched down and came screeching to a halt JUST
before the edge of the runway, the tires smoking.
“WHEW! That was CLOSE!” yelled the captain.”That runway was SHORT!”
“Yeah!” said the copilot,”and WIDE too!”
Quiet In Church
Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother Joel were sitting together in
church. Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud.
Finally, his big sister had enough. “You’re not supposed to talk out loud in
church.”
“Why? Who’s going to stop me?” Joel asked.
Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, “See those two men standing
by the door? They’re hushers!”
Stoning For Adultery
This woman was found committing adultery and the law says we should stone her!” one of the crowd responded.
“Wait,” yelled Jesus, “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”
Suddenly, a stone was thrown from out of the sky and knocked the woman on the side of her head.
“Aw, C’mon, Dad…,” Jesus cried, “I’m trying to make a point here!”
The more I get to
The more I get to know people, the better I like animals.
Monica’s Resume
Q: What does Monica Lewinsky have on her Resume?
A: “Sat on the Presidential Staff”
Revenge on a Whaling Ship
Two whales, a male and female, are swimming off the coast of
Japan when the male whale looks up and sees the whaling ship
that killed his father five years ago. Excited at the
opportunity to avenge his father’s death, the male whale says to
the female, “Let’s go underneath the ship and blow air through
our blow holes. That ought to knock their boat over, and make
them think twice about killing innocent whales.”
The female whale agrees, and the plan works perfectly. Once the
whaling ship has completely sunk, the male whale notices that
most of the sailors are making their way back to the shore by
either swimming or in lifeboats. Not willing to let them get
away so easily, the male whale yells “They’re going to shore.
Let’s go gobble them up!” Suddenly, the female whale becomes
less cooperative. “Hey!”, she says, “I agreed to the blowjob,
but I’m not swallowing any seamen!”
Dr Jones
There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working nights as a taxidermist. Upon graduation, he decided he could combine his two vocations to better serve the needs of his patients and their owners, while doubling his practice and, therefore, his income. He opened his own offices with a shingle on the door saying, “Dr. Jones, Veterinary Medicine and Taxidermy : Either way, you get your dog back!”
Wedding ring and a T
A wedding ring may not be as tight as a tourniquet, but it does an equally good job of stopping the circulation.
How many country singers does it take to change…
How many country singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to do it and one to write a crappy folk song about it.