Knock KnockWho’s there?Woody!Woody who?Woody answer the door please!
Author: admin
Dealing with criminals
A local policeman had just finished his shift one cold November evening and was at home with his wife. “You just won’t believe what happened this evening , in all my years on the force I’ve never seen anything like it.” “Oh yes dear, what happened ?” “I came across two guys down by the canal, one of them was drinking battery acid and the other was eating fireworks.” “Drinking battery acid and eating fireworks!! What did you do with them ?” “Oh that was easy, I charged one and let the other off.”
Knock Knock 4
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Ahmed!
Ahmed who?
Ahmedeus Motzart!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Alaska!
Alaska who?
Alaska my friend the question then!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Aida!
Aida who?
Aida lot of sweets and now I’ve got tummy ache!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Al!
Al who?
Al give you a kiss if you open this door!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Aladdin!
Aladdin who?
Aladdin the street wants a word with you!
Making her scream
How do you make your wife scream after an orgasm?
Wipe your dick on the curtains.
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Calamjo
Sardar smile
Do u know why sardar smiles when there is lightening?
Because he thinks some body is taking photograph of him.
D.A.M.
What does D.A.M stand for?
Mothers against Dyslexia!
Life with no parole
At 3am a wife wakes up and notices that her husband is not in bed. So, she goes downstairs to look for him and finds him sitting at the kitchen table, with a big tumbler of scotch in front of him. After he takes a drink, she notices that he wipes away a tear from his eye. She rushes to his side, kneels down beside him, holding his hand she says, “hony, what is wrong”?. He says, “do you remember when we started dating when you were sixteen years old”?. The wife replys, yes. He says, “do you remember when your dad caught us having sex in the back of my car”?. The wife replys, yes. He says, “do you remember when your dad stuck that shotgun in my face and told me that I either marry you or he would have me put in jail for twenty years”?. “yes, I remember that too, says the wife. The husband takes another drink, wipes away another tear, looks her in the eye and says, “well, I would have gotten out today”.
Wonder player
Manager: Our new midfielder cost ten million. I call him our wonder player
Fan: Why’s that?
Manager: Everytime he plays I wonder why I bothered to buy him!
Black or white…?
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, “Why is the bride dressed in white?”
“Because white is the color of happiness and today is the happiest day of her life,” her mother tried to explain, keeping it simple.
The child thought about this for a moment, then said, “So, why’s the groom wearing black?”
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Calamjo
What did the blonde�s left leg say to her right leg?
What did the blonde�s left leg say to her right leg? Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.
The best photos are generally
The best photos are generally attempted through the lens cap.
sleep in the barn
A police chief, a fire chief, and a city manager were traveling together by car to a municipal management conference in a distant city. Their car broke down in a rural area, and they were forced to seek shelter for the night at a nearby farmhouse. The farmer welcomed them in, but cautioned them that there were only two spare beds, and that one of them would have to sleep in the barn with the farm animals. After a short conference, the police chief agreed to take the barn. Shortly after retiring, a knock was heard on the door of the farmhouse. The party inside answered to find the police chief standing there, complaining that he could not sleep. There were pigs in the barn, he said, and he was reminded of the days when everyone called him a pig. The fire chief then volunteered to exchange with the police chief. A short time later, another knock was heard at the door. The fire chief complained that the cows in the barn reminded him of Mrs. O’Leary’s cow that started the Chicago fire, and that every time he started to go to sleep, he started to have a fireman’s worst nightmare, that of burning to death. The city attorney, in desperation for sleep, then agreed to sleep in the barn. This seemed like a good idea until a few minutes later, when another knock was heard at the door. When the occupants answered the door, there stood the very indignant cows and pigs.