Why are brunettes so proud of their hair?
It matches their moustache.
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman
Author: admin
IRS at a synagogue
An IRS agent stepped into a synagogue looking for the rabbi.
“Rabbi,” he said when he found him,” do you know a Mr. Morris Katz?”
“Well, yes, I do,” said the rabbi.
“Is he a member of your congregation?” asked the agent.
“Uh, yes, he is,” said the rabbi, “why do you ask?”
“I’m from the IRS. Can you tell me something? Did he make the $100,000 donation to the synagogue, that he claimed on his tax return?” asked the IRS agent.
“I would have to check our records,” replied the rabbi, “butn if he hasn’t, I can assure you that he will!”
A man and a woman just got married, the woman…
A man and a woman just got married, the woman who was a cheerleader desided to tease her new husband by doing some of her favorite cheers completely naked. Soon after she began her first cheer her husband screamed NO GOOD NO GOOD! Completely caught off guard she decided to move straight into her second cheer. Again, not long after begging her husband yelled out HELL YA!! and swooped her in his arm laying her on the bed and having wild wild sex with her for hours. The woman was really excited about this and decided to tell her best friend when she got home. As she relayed her story her friend asked her what the cheers were. The woman grinned and begin yelling them out
2 4 6 8 come on girls lets masturbate!!
the womans friend started laughing and asked her for the second cheer
sex is good
sex is fine
doggy style
69
just for fun
or getting paid
EVERYONE LOVES GETTING LAID!
Cold Hands
Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get there, the guy goes out to chop some wood. When he gets back, he says, “Honey, my hands are freezing!”
She says, “Well put them here between my legs and that will warm them up.”
After lunch he goes back out to chop some more wood and comes back and says again, “Man! My hands are really freezing!”
She says again, “Well put them here between my legs and warm them up.”
He does, and again that warms him up.After dinner, he goes out one more time to chop some wood to get them through the night. When he returns, he says again, “Wow, my hands are really, really freezing!”
She looks at him at says, “For crying out loud honey, don’t your ears ever get cold?!…”
The Chinese Tourist
Once there was a chinese guy that never knew english and went
to visited New York, and saw the statue of liberty,
so then he asked the person beside him “who built this
thing?”(in chinese)and the person said “what do you mean?’
“oh, whach yu min , that means he must be chinese”(in
chinese).So then he went on and saw the bridge.Then he
asked a lady “who built this bridge”(in chinese)then the lady
said”what do you mean” “oooooooooh, i want to meet
this man,(in chinese)So then he was smiling alot, and walking
and all of the people were staring at him, So then he
bumped into a funeral and asked “who’s in that that cofin?the
the man said “what do you mean” ” oh no, whach yu min
is dead!, and then he went crying back to china.
I am waxing the car
Addie: “Why are you wearing your winter coat?”
Erik: “Because I am waxing the car.”
Addie: “Why do you need a winter coat to wax the car?”
Erik: ” The wax container said a heavy coat makes the shine last longer!”
ur momma was walking down the sidewalk and…
ur momma was walking down the sidewalk and crapped her pants HAHAHAHAHAH
Wine
A priest is driving down to New York to see a show, and he’s stopped in Connecticut for speeding.
Smelling alcohol on the good father’s breath and noticing a wine bottle on the passenger’s seat, the state trooper asks, “Sir, have you been drinking?”
The minister replies, “Just water.”
“Then, why do I smell wine?” the trooper inquires.
The minister looks down at the bottle and exclaims, “Good Lord, he’s done it again!”
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Calamjo
Knock KnockWho’s there?Bea!Bea who?Beatle Bailey!
Knock KnockWho’s there?Bea!Bea who?Beatle Bailey!
French Happiness
When Charles deGaulle decided to retire from public life, the American ambassador and his wife threw a gala dinner party in his honor. At the dinner table the Ambassador’s wife was talking with Madame deGaulle.”Your husband has been such a prominent public figure, such a presence on the French and International scene for so many years! How quiet retirement will seem in comparison. What are you most looking forward to in these retirement years?””A penis,” replied Madame deGaulle.A huge hush fell over the table. Everyone heard her answer…and no one knew what to say next.Finally, Le Grand Charles leaned over to his wife and said, “Ma cherie, I believe zee Americans pronounce zat word, ‘appiness.”
Iba un borracho por la
Iba un borracho por la carretera conduciendo a 195 km/h cuando le para la policia y le retira el carnet por 3 meses. Al cabo de dos d�as, el borracho se salta las normas y vuelve a conducir sin permiso a una velocidad de 200 km/h, le vuelve a parar la policia, le pide los papeles y ve que le falta el carnet:
“�Oye, tu! �d�nde esta el carnet de conducir?”
Y el borracho responde:
“�joder! �ya lo habeis perdido?”
A Hunting We Will Go
A man finally talked his blonde wife into going hunting with him. While
they were out hunting, the man heard gunshots ring out from the area where
his wife was. He ran up in time to hear a cowboy say, “OK, OK lady, it’s
your deer, just let me take my saddle off it.”