Q: How did the dumb blonde break her leg raking leaves?
A: She fell out of the tree.
Author: admin
The sweater
A cop is driving down the freeway when he sees a blonde knitting while she is driving.
Confused he turns on his siren and loudpeaker and says, “pullover, pullover.” The blond looks up at the cop and then down and screams, ” No, it s a sweater!”
Wedding night
Three guys who have just got married are sitting in their hotel bar after all the receptions having a beer. As they talk, it transpires that all three are virgins, and are a bit naive about how many times they can expect to have sex with their new bride that evening.
One devises a plan of how they can relay this information to the others at breakfast without getting a slap.
`All we do is order as many rounds of toast for how many times you had it last night,’ he says, and the others readily agree.
At breakfast the next morning, all three guys look very happy with themselves. The first bloke orders cornflakes, and in a loud voice asks for four slices of toast, and the others give him a wink and a thumbs-up.
The next guy orders scrambled eggs, and again in a voice so the others can hear, orders six slices of toast. Again, his mates give him a `good-on-yer’ look.
The next guy orders a full English breakfast, and then asks for eight slices of toast. His mates give a low whistle of approval, and as the waiter walks away, the guy says to the waiter, `Oh, and could you make two of those brown, please, mate.’
What do you call a r
What do you call a room full of blondes with PMS and yeast infections? A wine and cheese party!
What do true rednecks do
What do true rednecks do on Halloween?
– Pump kin.
Un marinero algo ignorante que
Un marinero algo ignorante que llevaba a�os en alta mar vuelve a su hogar y descubre sorprendido que tiene un hijo negro. Debido a que era totalmente blanco le pregunta a su esposa: “Pero… �como es posible que tengamos un hijo negro si yo soy blanco y t� tambi�n?”
“Ver�s, como no ten�a leche, tuve que buscarme una ama de cr�a para que amamantara al ni�o, y como ella era negra, el ni�o se puso de ese color.”
El marinero, no muy convencido, decide ir a consultarlo con su madre, le cuenta la historia y la madre responde:
“Claro que puede ser, f�jate por ejemplo en ti mismo, de peque�o te di leche de vaca, y mira que lindos cuernos te est�n saliendo, �idiota!”
Bees hair
�Mummy,� says little Issy, �Why do bees have sticky hair?�
�Because they use honeycombs.�
Saddam and General Custer
Q. What do Saddam Hussein and General Custer have in common?
A. They both want to know where the hell those Tomahawks are coming from!
Man�s idea of helping with the housework
Q. What�s a man�s idea of helping with the housework?
A. Lifting his legs so you can vacuum.
Happy to be married
A groom passes down the aisle of the church to take his
place by the altar and the best man notices that the groom
has the biggest, brightest smile on his face. The best man
says, “Hey man, I know you are happy to be getting married,
but what’s up – you look so excited.”
The groom replies, “I just had the best blow job I have ever had
in my entire life and I am marrying the wonderful woman who
gave it to me.”
The bride comes walking down the aisle and she, too, has the
biggest, brightest smile on her face. The maid of honor notices
this and says, “Hey, girlfriend, I know you are happy to be
getting married, but what’s up, you look so excited.”
The bride replies, “I have just given the last blow job of my
entire life!”
For people who have seen Kung-Pow
What Do You get when you cross an owl with a bungie cord?
:MY @$$
Down the rainbow
3 women, a blonde, a brunette and a redhead were told that if they slide down a magical rainbow and shouted what they wanted to land in they would land in it.
The redhead shouted, MEN. and she lands in a group of men.
The brunette shouts, MONEY. And lands in a pile of money.
The blonde shouts, WEEEEEEEE… and well…