Well, the flu has finally struck me! I have avoided it for several years, but now I’m very sick! Before I start studying for my blood test tomorrow, I thought I’d pull out this list of medical terms. It really impresses those doctors when you know all the latest medical terminology!
Artery – The Study of paintings
Bacteria – Back door to the cafeteria
Barium – What you do when CPR fails
Benign – What you be after you be eight
Bowel – A letter like A, E, I, O, U, and sometimes Y
Caesarean Section – A neighborhood near Rome
Cat Scan – Searching for Kitty
Cauterize – Made eye contact with the nurse
Colic – A Sheep Dog
Coma – A punctuation mark
Congenital – Friendly
D&C – Where Washington is located
Dilate – To live long
Enema – Not a friend
GI Series – Baseball `etween teams of soldiers
Grippe – A Suitcase
Hangnail – A coat hook
Impotent – Distinguished, well known
Labor Pain – Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff – A Doctor’s cane
Morbid – A higher offer
Nitrate – Cheaper than the day rate
Node – Was aware of
Outpatient – A person who has fainted
Pelvis – Cousin to Elvis
Post-operative – A letter carrier
Protein – In favor of young people
Recovery Room – Where you have your upholstery done
Rectum – Darn near killed him
Rheumatic Fever – Amorouc feeling
Secretion – Hiding anything
Seizure – A Roman emperor
Tablet – A small table
Terminal Illness – Sick at the airport
Tibia – North African country
Tumor – An extra pair
Urine – Opposite of you’re out
Varicose Veins – Veins which are very close together