Yo’ mama’s teeth are so crooked, each tooth has a sign saying, ”One mile to
the next tooth.”
Author: admin
Silence
Q. Why do married men like blowjobs so much?
A. 15 minutes of silence.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
How do can you……
How can you tell someone is blonde?
when they look at you!
Put-Downs
Roses are red, violets are blue, I once thought I was ugly, until I saw you!
Just because you have one doesn’t mean you have to act like one!
Baptists: only trouble is, they don’t hold them under long enough.
A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do. A woman must do what he can’t.
Men’s brains are like the prison system – not enough cells.
Stupidity does not qualify as a handicap, park elsewhere!
You have a right to your opinions. I just don’t want to hear them.
Your mamas dieting
your mamas so fat people visit her ass in a spaceship
Season tickets
A woman is watching the news.
During a commercial she turns to her husband, who is busy with a crossword puzzle.
�Did you hear that?� she asks.
�A man in Los Angeles swapped his wife for Lakers� season tickets. Would you do a thing like that?�
�Well no,� her husband replies. �The season�s half over.�
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Calamjo
Clinton one-liner
Bob Kerrey, when asked about Bill Clinton dodging the draft: “Do I care if he evaded the draft? Well, a part of me does.” [Mr. Kerrey lost a leg in Vietnam]
What do you do if a
what do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you.
pull the pin and throw it back.
A minister tells a joke
A preacher, who shall we say was “humor impaired,” attended a conference to help encourage and better equip pastors for their ministry.Among the speakers were many well known and dynamic speakers. One such boldly approached the pulpit and, gathering the entire crowd’s attention, said, “The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman that wasn’t my wife!” The crowd was shocked! He followed up by saying, “And that woman was my mother!” – The crowd burst into laughter and delivered the rest of his talk, which went over quite well.The next week, the pastor decided he’d give this humor thing a try, and use that joke in his sermon. As he surely approached the pulpit that sunny Sunday, he tried to rehearse the joke in his head. It suddenly seemed a bit foggy to him.Getting to the microphone he said loudly, “The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of another woman that was not my wife!” The congregation inhaled half the air in the room. After standing there for almost 10 seconds in the stunned silence, trying to recall the second half of the joke, the pastor finally blurted out, “…and I can’t remember who she was!”
Borkowski’s Law…
- Borkowski’s Law
- You can’t guard against the arbitrary.
Dave’s adventure in a cave (limerick)
There once was a man named Dave,
who found a dead whore in a cave.
She was ugly as shit
and missing one tit,
but think of the money he saved!
A tornado goes through your
A tornado goes through your trailer’s yard and makes it look neater.You’ve got to shuck your toilet paper before you use it.You have an autographed picture of Bob Barker in your wallet.