Author: admin

If agony aunts were uncles:

Reader: My husband-to-be ,still pines for his old girlfriends. I’m afraid he will not be faithful.

Jim: A man’s capacity to love is boundless, it has been proven to increase with the number of sexual partners. Thus, by having a few other women, your partner is really increasing his love for you. Best thing to do is to buy him a nice. expensive present, and cook him a nice meal and don’t mention this aspect of has behavior.

Reader: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.

Jim: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. Far from being pleasurable, a night out with the boys is a stressful affair and to get back to you is a relief for your partner. Just look back at how emotional and happy the man is when he returns to his stable home. Best thing to do is to buy him a nice, expensive present, and cook him a nice meal and don’t mention this aspect of his behavior.

Reader: My husband wants to experience three-in-a-bed-sex with me and my sister.

Jim: Your husband is clearly devoted to you. He cannot get enough of you, so he goes for the next best thing – your sister. Far from being an issue, this will bring all of the family together. Why not get mum involved? If you are still apprehensive, then let him go with your relatives, buy him a nice, expensive present, and cook him a nice meal and don’t mention this aspect of his behavior.

Reader: My husband continually asks me to perform oral sex with him.

Jim: Do it. Sperm is not only great tasting, but with only 10 calories a spoonful it is nutritious and helps you to keep tour figure and gives a great glow to the skin. Interestingly, a man knows this. His offer to you to perform oral sex with him is totally selfless. Oral sex is extremely painful for a man. This shows he loves you. Best thing to do is to thank him, buy him a nice, expensive present and cook him a nice meal.

Reader: My husband doesn’t know where my clitoris is.

Jim: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with it, do it in your own time. To help with the family budget, you may wish to video yourself while doing this and to sell it at a car boot sale. To ease your selfish guilt, buy your man a nice, expensive present and cook a delicious meal.

Estaba Pepito en plena Revoluci�n al lado de Carranza y Zapata. En ese tiempo ya no hab�a que comer y pues ya era justo ingerir algo.

Entonces, a Carranza se le ocurre una idea:

“Viendo la situaci�n y como ya no que comer, pues nos tendremos que comer a los humanos; para empezar, yo como soy Carranza, me toca la panza”.

“Y yo como soy Zapata, me como la pata”.

“Pues yo como soy Pepito… �Ya no tengo hambre!”

Un tipo llega de noche a un hotel y pide una habitaci�n. El encargado le informa:

“S�lo tengo una cama, en un cuarto compartido, pero nadie la quiere. Lo que pasa es que el otro hu�sped ronca muy fuerte”.

“S� es s�lo eso, no hay problema”, acepta el viajero. Toma la llave, sus maletas y sube a la habitaci�n.

A la ma�ana siguiente, el hombre baja de lo m�s contento y descansado. Intrigado, el encargado le saluda:

“Buenos d�as. �Durmi� bien?”

“Perfectamente, gracias”.

“�Y el se�or de los ronquidos?”

“�l no peg� un ojo en toda la noche. Apenas ahora debe estar qued�ndose dormido”.

“�C�mo dice?”

“Ver� usted: anoche lo primero que hice al entrar en la habitaci�n fue plantarle tremendo besote en la boca. Despu�s de eso �l se pas� toda la noche con los ojos abiertos como platos y el trasero pegado a la pared”.