Author: admin

one day there was a cat,it was a dumb cat.why is this cat dumb
you ask?well lets get this shitty joke out of here!this cat was
so dumb that when he saw 2 guyz making out it jumped on them and
said,”Hey dudes”and he started to lick their faces.I dont know
who made this joke up but it sure is a load of
crap!OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YA a blond made this one up!!!that stupid
ass blondie!

A pastor is ending up his sermon one Sunday morning when he says, “Ok, now next week I am going to preach a sermon on lying. I want you all to read Mark chapter 17.”

The next Sunday the pastor begins his sermon:
“Ok I hope we all had a good weekend. Now, let me see. Who all read Mark chapter 17?”

He waited a few minuets as he watched the entire congregation raise their hands.

“Well, since Mark only has 16 chapters, let me begin my sermon on lying!”

There were three guys traveling in Africa, a Frenchman, Japanese, and an
American. They are captured by a tribe of fierce headhunters. The witch doctor
says to them, “we are going to slaughter you, but you might take some comfort in
the fact that we don’t believe in waste here and that therefore every part of
your body will go to some use. We will weave baskets out of your hair, we will
render your bones for glue, and we will tan your skin and stretch it over wooden
frames for canoes. Now we are going to allow you an honorable death, so I will
give you each a knife and allow you to say some last words before killing
yourselves.”
The Japanese guy yells “banzai!” and commits hari-kari.
The French guy yells “vive la France!” and slits his throat.
then the American guy takes the knife, pokes holes all over his body, and
yells, “there’s your f****** canoe!”

Yo Mama is so fat, that her first word was oink.

What’s the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife?
– A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry.