A young couple got married and went on a cruise for their
honeymoon. When they got back from the honeymoon, the bride
immediately called her mother, who lived a couple of hours away.
“Well, darling,” said her mother, “how was the honeymoon?” “Oh,
mother,” she replied, “the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic,
we had a terrific time! But, as soon as we returned, Sam began
using really horrible language. I’ve never heard these words
before. Really terrible 4-letter words. You’ve got to come get
me and take me home. PLEASE MOTHER!” And the new bride began to
sob over the telephone. “But honey,” the mother countered, “what
4-letter words?” “I can’t tell you, mother,” said the daughter,
“they’re too awful! Please come and get me!” “Darling daughter,
you must tell me what has you so upset. Tell me the 4-letter
words!” Still sobbing, the bride said, “Mother, he used words
like: DUST…WASH…IRON…COOK
A man bought an ‘ad’ in the classifieds: “Wife wanted”. The next
day he received a thousand letters. They all said the same
thing: “You can have mine.”
“Honey,” said this husband to his wife, “I invited a friend home
for supper.” “What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn’t
go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don’t feel like
cooking a fancy meal!” “I know all that.” “Then why did you
invite a friend for supper?” “Because the poor fool’s thinking
about getting married.”