why is the libray the talest building?
because there are so many stories
Author: admin
The first time
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner with her parents.
Since this is such a big event, the girl tells him that after dinner, she would like to have sex with him for the first time.
The boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacy to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour.
He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex. At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he’d like to buy a 3-pack, 10-pack or family pack.
The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girls parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. “Oh I’m so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!”.
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl’s parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head.
A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down. 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy.
Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend,
“I had no idea you were this religious.” The boy turns, and whispers back, “I had no idea your father was a pharmacist!”
First time at Football
A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game. Afterward he asked her how she like the game.”I liked it, but I couldn’t understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents,” she said.”What do you mean?” he asked.”Well, everyone kept yelling, ‘Get the quarter back!'”
Soviet Union
What’s meant by an exchange opinions in the Communist party of the Soviet
Union?
It’s when I come to a party meeting with my own opinion, and I leave
with the party’s.
Jamie Bennett is the coolest!!!
How many jokes would you have read if you didnt waste your time looking at this?
OUCH!
Knock Knock Who’s there? Madam Madam who? MADAM FOOTS STUCK IN THE DOOR!
Quits
When a women found out that she was pregnant,
she lit up the phone lines telling everyone the good news.
One day, she took her 4 year old son,Sam,out shopping.
A woman asked the boy if he was excited about the baby.
� Yes”, he said.� I know what we’re going to name it.
If it is a girl, we’re calling her Molly and if it is a
boy, we’re going to call it quits.
Dolly and the Queen in Heaven
Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day, and they both go before the angel to find out if they’ll be admitted to heaven. Unfortunately, there’s only one space left that day, so the angel must decide which of them gets in.
The angel asks Dolly if there’s some particular reason why she should go to heaven, whereupon she takes off her top and says, “Look at these. They’re the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I’m sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity.”
The angel thanks Dolly, and asks Her Majesty the same question. The Queen drops her skirt and panties, takes a bottle of Perrier out of her purse, shakes it up, and douches with it. The angel says, “OK, Your Majesty, you may go in”.
Dolly is outraged. “What was that all about? I show you two of God’s own perfect creations and you turn me down. She performs a rude act of hygiene and she gets in. Can you explain that to me?”
“Sorry, Dolly,” says the angel, ” but even in heaven, a royal flush beats two of a kind.
Girl Talk After Sex
Brunette after sex “Oh that was great! Love you… wanna marry?”
Redhead after sex “Better start chewing some VITAMINS, kid.”
Blonde after sex “Next!”
Yo mamma
yo mamma so poor she cant even pay attention
How to:
How to keep an idiot busy for hours
Pool Party
There is a redhead a brunet and a blonde
they were all invited to a pool party the
redhead walks in wearing a wonepiece then the brunette comes in wearing a onepiece then the blonde comes in wearing a onepiece and says didnt you know onepieces are so out of style.