Author: admin

There was a farmer. He had alot of chickens but had no roosters.

So in order to get eggs he went and got a rooster. The man he got the rooster form told him that the rooster would screw everything in sight. But the farmer wanted the rooster anyway.

So he took it home and it screwed all the chickens. After a while it started screwing all the other farm animals.

So one day the farmer walked up to the rooster and said,”Ya better stop screwing everything or you will screw yourself to death!” But the rooster just kept on screwing.

One day the farmer was walking through the field, and he found the rooster laying on the ground with buzzards flying all around.

So he walked up to the rooster and said,”I told you you’d screw yourself to death!” then the rooster opened his eyes and said, – “SHUT-UP! I’m trying to get them to land!”

Paddy and Paddy, two Irishmen, went out one day and each bought a pig.

When they got home, Paddy turned to Paddy and said “Paddy, me ol’ mate,
how we gonna tell who owns which fookin pig?”

Paddy says, “Well Paddy, I’ll cut one a ta’ ears off my fookin pig, and
ten we can tell ’em apart.” “Ah tat’d be grand.” Says Paddy.

This worked fine until a couple of weeks later when Paddy stormed into the
house.

“Paddy” he said “Your fookin pig has chewed the ear offa my fookin pig.
Now we got two fookin pigs with on one ear each. How we gonna tell who
owns which fookin pig?”

“Well Paddy” said Paddy “I’ll cut ta other ear off my fookin pig. Ten
we’ll av two fookin pigs and only one of them will avan ear”

“Ah tat’d be grand.” says Paddy.

Again this worked fine until a couple of weeks later when Paddy again
stormed into the house.

“Paddy” he said “Your fookin pig has chewed the other ear offa my fookin
pig. Now we got two fookin pigs with no fookin ears. How we gonna tell who
owns which fookin pig?”

“Ah tis is serious, Paddy.” Said Paddy “I’ll tell ya what I’ll do I’ll cut
ta tail offa my fookin pig. Ten we’ll av two fookin pigs with no fookin
ears and only one fookin tail.”

“Ah tat’d be grand.” Says Paddy.

Another couple of weeks went by, and you guessed it, Paddy stormed into
the house once more.

“PADDY” shouted Paddy “YOUR FOOKIN PIG HAS CHEWED THE FOOKIN TAIL OFFA MY
FOOKIN PIG AND NOW WE GOT TWO FOOKIN PIGS WITH NO FOOKIN EARS AND NO
FOOKIN TAILS!!!!!!!!!!! HOW THE FOOK ARE WE GONNA FOOKIN TELL ‘EM
APART!!!!!!!!!!”

“Ah fook it.” Says Paddy “How’s about you have the black one, and I’ll
have the white one?”