Why did the blonde take his new scarf back to the store?It was too tight
Author: admin
Yo momma
your momma so dum she stole free bread
Ground first
Q: If a blonde and a brunette are tossed off a building, who hits the ground
first?
A: The brunette. The blonde has to stop to ask for directions.
Clinton Coincidence?
The following phrase:PRESIDENT CLINTON OF THE USAcan be rearranged (with no letters left over, and using each letter only once) into:TO COPULATE HE FINDS INTERNSCoincidence? I think not.
Social Democrats do that.
Q: How many republicans does it take to disarm the _LAW-ABIDING_ public so
that the government can enforce totalitarianistic and
unconstitutional laws?
A: None. The Social Democrats do that.
Top 10 Benefits of a White House Internship
10. First-hand knowledge of domestic affairs
9. Pay is lousy, but the hush money is great
8. Gives new meaning to MTV slogan “Rock the Vote”
7. Observe the President’s commitment to young people first hand
6. Learn intricacies of statutory rape law
5. Have president chase around desk brandishing his “subpoena”
4. President tells you he really wants you on his staff
3. Try out JFK’s legendary rocking chair
2. Have president introduce you to his “special investigator”…
… and the number one benefit of a White House internship…
1. Find out what a politician means when he says he’s been polling his constituents!
Where Did You Get The Idea?
On the way home from the party, the woman said to her husband, “Have I ever told you how handsome and sexy and irresistible to women you are?”
“Why no,” said the husband, flattered.
“Then what the hell gave you that idea at the party?!” she yelled.
Surgical Error
A man goes into the hospital for a vasectomy.
Shortly after he recovers from his an anesthetic, his surgeon comes in and tells him: “Well, I’ve got good news and I’ve got bad news for you.”
“Give me the bad news first, Doc.” says the patient. “I’m afraid that we accidentally cut your balls off during surgery, son.” “Oh my god!” the patient cries, breaking into tears. “But the good news,” the doctor adds, “is that we had them biopsied and you’ll be relieved to know that they weren’t malignant!”
Don’t belong
Which of these three don’t belong?
A Green Bean
A Soy Bean
A Vibrator
The Green Bean. The other two are meat substitutes.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
A long lost brother
A North Dakotan went to New York on a buisness trip. When the trip was
over, he took a taxi cab to get to the airport. The cab driver heard how
the intelligance of the North Dakotans lacks, so, he turned to the North
Dakotan and said “My mother had 3 kids, one was my brother, one was my
sister, who was the 3rd?” the North Dakotan had no idea. “You Idiot! The
3rd one was ME!” The North Dakotan went home to his wife and kissed her.
“Hey, honey!” said the North Dakotan. His wife responded saying “What?”
The North Dakotan said “My mother had 3 kids, one was my brother, one was
my sister, who was the 3rd one?” His wife was stumped “I don’t know, Who?”
the North Dakotan responded saying “Some cab driver in New York.”
The Truth
With all due respect, President Clinton was telling the truth when he said he was not having sex with that woman…
Of course he was referring to Hillary!
Blind Eye
The husband arrives home early from work one evening to see his
wife on the floor scrubbing the kitchen tiles.
Her tantalizing rear is shaking and she is only wearing a mini
skirt and a pair of white cotton knickers. Because she is bent
over, her panties are showing out the bottom of her skirt. The
husband also notices that her panties have a little wet spot,
meaning she is ready for him
He tip toes over to her and she is completely unaware of his
presence. He pulls down her panties and begins to lick up her
juices. She is groaning and moaning and shaking her rear at him.
He gets a hard on and decides to fuck her right then and there.
he whips out his cock and proceeds to fuck her like he never has
before. It went on for hours. When he was finished, he clipped
her over the ear.
She looked stunned, turned to him and said “What was that for?”
He replied, “That was for not turning around to see who it was!”