Author: admin

Q. Why is Italy shaped like a boot?

A. They couldn’t fit all that shit in a slipper.

Somewhere over Australia…The plane contains a pilot, co-pilot and a load of sheep. The route is long and the weather is abominable. Nearing their destination the pilot realizes that the fuel is insufficient. “I’m afraid we are just not going to make it Steve. We must prepare to jump.” advises the pilot.The co-pilots says, “WHAT ABOUT THE SHEEP!””FUCK THE SHEEP!” replies the pilot.”DO YOU THINK WE HAVE TIME?” Steve Inquires.

Un hombre ten�a un puesto para rejuvenecer camellos en el Sahara. Un tipo que ten�a un camello viejo y cansado lo lleva a dicho lugar y le dice al due�o que vea qu� puede hacer, aunque es bastante esc�ptico de los resultados.

El due�o del local le dice que no se preocupe, que en unos minutos se lo deja como nuevo, y grita: “�Ahmeeeed!.

Del fondo del local sale un negro de dos metros con un miembro gigantesco y se lo introduce al camello; el pobre animal se levanta como si tuviera 20 a�os menos, y sale corriendo hasta desaparecer en el horizonte.

El due�o del camello, impresionado, dice: “!Qu� buena forma de rejuvenecer camellos!, pero ahora tengo otro problema: �c�mo lo alcanzo?”

El due�o del local dice:

“�No se preocupe, en segida lo alcanza! �Ahmeeeeed…!”

The young Ensign approached the crusty old Chief and asked him about the origin of the commissioned office insignias.”Well, Ensign, it’s history and tradition. First, we give you a gold bar representing that you’re valuable BUT malleable. The silver bar of a Lieutenant Junior Grade represents value, but less malleable. When you make Lieutenant, you’re twice as valuable so we give you two silver bars.”As a Captain, you soar over military masses, hence the eagle. As an Admiral, you’re obviously a star. That answer your question?””Yeah, but what about Commanders and Lieutenant Commanders?””Now that goes waaaaaay back in history. Back to the Garden of Eden even. You see, we’ve always covered our pricks with leaves…”