There is a tharapy calss for men who stutter. The teacher is a
very beautiful young woman. So the calss is for 1 year only, and
by the time that year is up, the three men who are in the class
will no longer stutter. Well, about 11 months went by and the
men were not stuttering as much. So in the 12th month, the woman
says,”well, this whole thing is almost over and you still
stutter. I know how i can get you to stop. I will ask you where
you’re from, and if you can tell me the city without stuttering,
i will have mad sex with you.”
The next class the woman asks the first man,”what city were you
born in?” The man says,” Nnnnnnew Yyyyyorrk.”
She asks the second man,”what city do you live in now?”
The man replies,”Pppppittsbbbburg.”
She asks the third man, “Where do you live now?”
The third man says,”Miami…”
They then make mad love for hours.
After they’re done, the man says,”Bbbbeach.”
Author: admin
Disco
Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights
flashing?
A: Yes.
Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
A: Yes, sir.
Q: What did she say?
A: What disco am I at?
Brown Balls
The father of 17 kids goes to the doc’s with a rash on his belly.”All right” says the Doc, “drop ’em and let’s have a look.”Having been confronted with the evidence the Doc exclaims “Yes, you’ve got a bad rash there, but my word, what brown balls you’ve got. They’re truly remarkable!”.The patient is a bit embarrassed and says “Look Doc, what about the rash?””Oh that’s easy,” said the Doc, “Here’s some cream to rub on. By the way, those brown balls are amazing, my I ask…..””No,” said the patient, “You can’t. Now, is that all Doc?””Well, ” said the Doctor, ” You could stop the rash coming back with a bit better hygiene. Tell your wife you need clean underpants every day, and those really are the brownest balls I’ve ever seen!”The guy goes home and tells his wife that the Doctor says he needs clean underpants every day.”What?”she yells, “Clean underpants every day, and me with 17 kids to chase after! Seventeen kids to wash, feed, clothe, get to school, tidy after, and you want clean underpants every day? You must be bloody joking, I haven’t even got time to wipe my arse!””Ah” he said, “And that’s another thing I wanted to talk to you about…”
Locked Out
Two blondes went shopping one day. They got done shopping and
went out to their brand new, cherry red convertible. They got to
the car and noticed that they had locked their keys in the car.
So they tried to think of a way to get the keys out. After
trying for an hour and a half, one blonde notices that there is
a rainstorm coming and says, “You better hurry up because it is
gonna rain and the top is down!”
Money for my men, blood from our forces
Well, a man comes on the 6 o�clock news
Said Saddam needs shot, Saddam needs defused
Saddam has weapons hiding
Saddam wants a war
Saddam’s got to pay
Saddam ain’t gettin’ too far yeah
He won’t be gettin’ far
My pappy tells me “Georgie, back in my day, son
This man would answer for all the wicked that he done”
“Take all the troops and weapons
Go into Baghdad, see, round up all of his bad boys
Hang them high in the street for all the people to see that”
A mailed fist is one thing you will always find
You got to threaten with your war toys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles we�ll sing a victory tune
We�ll divide all of the local loot soon
We�ll praise our new crusades against evil doers
Singing “money for my men, blood from our forces”
We got too many arabs doing dirty deeds
We feed hate and corruption, they protest in their streets
It�s time the ol’ U. S. of A. put a few more in the ground
Send �em all to their maker, that�ll settle �em down
You can bet we�ll set �em down �cause
A mailed fist is one thing you will always find
You got to threaten with your war toys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles we�ll sing a victory tune
We�ll divide all of the local loot soon
We�ll praise our new crusades against evil doers
Singing “money for my men, blood from our forces”
A mailed fist is one thing you will always find
You got to threaten with your war toys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles we�ll sing a victory tune
We�ll divide all of the local loot soon
We�ll praise our new crusades against evil doers
Singing “money for my men, blood from our forces”.
Oral Sex
After having been commissioned by God to take a survey of how man was doing on Earth, St. Peter now stood before his boss ready to present his findings. ‘Tell me, St. Peter, what have you found out?’ God asked. ‘I’m very sorry to have to tell you this, but the people are behaving in a sinful manner. There’s drugs, alcohol, murders, you name it – a regular Sodom and Gomorra. But the worst is this new obsession with oral sex. According to my survey, 88% of the population is doing it. Even four out of five dentists recommend it. I’m afraid it has reached epidemic proportions.’ ‘Hmmm,’ God said thoughtfully, ‘Do you have any recommendations as to what should be done to put an end to this sexual perversion?’ ‘I think we should send a message to everyone on Earth who engages in oral sex. The Contents of that message should tell them exactly what will happen to them on judgment day if they do not stop this type of activity.’ replied St. Peter. ‘That is an effective solution,’ God stated, ‘but I think that instead of punishing those who practice oral sex, we should reward those who refrain from it. Let’s send a letter that’s personally signed by me to each one of these good people.’ Do you know what the letter said?(scroll down) No? You didn’t get one either, huh?
Sex
What’s a man’s definition of a romantic evening?
Sex.
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Yisman
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TGIF
Why do blondes have ‘TGIF’ written on their shoes?
Toes Go In First.
Underneath every successful man there is a…
Underneath every successful man there is a woman.
Claustrophobic
Someone who is afraid of Santa Claus.
Q: How many Republican
Q: How many Republican Presidential candidates from 1988 did it take to change a lightbulb?A: (Robertson) Oh, Lord, with thy divine illumination, heal this light bulb!