Author: admin

Amit era un alto funcionario de la corte del Rey Akbar. Hac�a ya alg�n tiempo, �l nutr�a un deseo de chupar los voluptuosos senos de la Reina hasta extasiarse. Un d�a, le revel� su deseo secreto a Birbal, el consejero del Rey, y le pidi� que lo ayudara. Despu�s de pensarlo bien, Birbal estuvo de acuerdo en ayudarlo a cambio de mil monedas de oro. Amit acept� el precio.

Al d�a siguiente, Birbal prepar� un l�quido que causaba comez�n y lo derram� en el sost�n de la Reina que hab�a dejado fuera mientras se ba�aba. Poco despu�s comenz� la comez�n en sus senos, aumentando en intensidad a medida que pasaban las horas, dejando al Rey muy preocupado. Enseguida llamaron a Birbal para solicitar su opini�n sobre el caso, a lo que �l contesta que solamente una saliva muy especial aplicada por un periodo de cuatro horas curar�a el mal. Birbal tambi�n dijo que afortunadamente esa saliva podr�a ser encontrada en la boca de Amit.

El Rey Akbar mand� a llamar a Amit inmediatamente, quien por las siguientes cuatro horas chup� salvajemente los senos de la Reina. Lamiendo, mordiendo, apretando y manoseando los senos de la Reina, Amit hizo su sue�o realidad.

Satisfecho, Amit se encontr� horas m�s tarde con Birbal. Como la misi�n de aquel ya estaba cumplida y la libido de Amit satisfecha, �ste se rehus� a pagar al consejero y encima se hizo el indignado. Por supuesto, Amit sab�a que Birbal nunca podr�a contar al Rey la verdad.

Pero Amit hab�a subestimado a Birbal. Al d�a siguiente, Birbal, para vengarse, coloc� el mismo l�quido en los calzoncillos del Rey, quien inmediatamente mand� a llamar a Amit.

Joe and his two friends freinds accidentally die in a car wreck and go to Heaven. They see and angel and she tells them that they can do anything they want but warns them not to step on the pink clouds.

So one day, one of Joe’s friends goes and steps on the pink cloud, and a really ugly gal pops up and says, “I have to follow you for the rest of eternity.”

Joe’s other friend, assuming that the ugly gal is out of the way, steps on a pink cloud, and once again a really ugly gal pops up and tells him you have she has to follow him for the rest of eternity.

One day, Joe’s two freinds are walking around and they see you with a really hot gal, so they run up to you and the say, “Hey man! How did you get this really hot gal?”

She turns around and says, “I stepped on a pink cloud.”

The Sultan of Brunei was getting a bit cheesed off as he had 6 children, all
girls, and therefore had no son and heir. Imagine his joy then, when one of his
wives presented him with his only son and heir.

Just before his son’s sixth birthday, the Sultan took him to one side and
said, “Son, I am very proud of you. Anything you want, I shall get for you”. His
son replied, “Daddy, I would like an aeroplane”.

Not wanting to do anything by halves, his father bought him British Airways.
Just before his son’s seventh birthday, the Sultan took him to one side.

“Son, you are my pride and joy. Anything you want, I shall get for you.” His
son replied, “Daddy, I would like a boat”.

Not wanting to do anything by halves, his father bought him P&O Ferries. Just
before his son’s eight birthday, the Sultan took him to one side. “Son, you
bring so much happiness into my life. Anything you want, shall get for you.” His
son replied, “Daddy, I would like something to watch films on”.

Not wanting to do anything by halves, his father bought him MGM Studios and
their cinemas, where he watched all his favorite Western Movies. Just before his
son’s ninth birthday, the Sultan took him to one side. “Son, you are an
inspiration to us all. Anything you want, I shall get for you.”

His son, who had caught the ‘Western’ movie bug, replied, “Daddy, I would like
a cowboy outfit”. Not wanting to do anything by halves, his father went and
bought him the England football team.

A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean.

The audience would be different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again.

There was only one problem: The captain’s parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick.

Once he understood he started shouting in the middle of the show:

“Look, it’s not the same hat.”

“Look, he is hiding the flowers under the table.”

“Hey, why are all the cards the Ace of Spades?”

The magician was furious but couldn’t do anything, it was, after all, the captain’s parrot.

One day the ship had an accident and sank.

The magician found himself floating on a piece of wood in the middle of the ocean with the parrot, of course.

They stared at each other with hate, but did not utter a word. This went on for a day and another and another.

After a week the parrot said, “OK, I give up. Where’s the boat?”

Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis

On their first date, Joe took Rose to the carnival. When he asked her what she wanted to do first, Rose replied, “Get weighed.”So Joe took her to the man with the scale who guesses people’s weight. He looked at Rose and said, “One hundred and twenty pounds.” Since Rose weighed in at one seventeen, she collected a prize.Next they went on the roller coaster. When the ride was finished, Joe asked Rose what she wanted to do next.”Get weighed,” she said. So they went back to the man with the scale, who of course guessed Rose’s weight correctly.Leaving without a prize, they went for a ride on the merry-go-round. After they got off, Joe asked Rose what she wanted to do next.”I want to get weighed!” she said again.Joe began to think this girl was quite strange, and decided to end the evening quickly. He left her at the door with a quick handshake.Rose’s roommate was waiting up for her to return and asked how the evening went.”Wousy!” Rose replied.

A Jes�s le pasaban informes semanales y ve�a con tristeza que casi todo el mundo consum�a drogas, as� que decide mandar a sus doce ap�stoles para que investiguen con m�s detalle y le lleven muestras de las drogas que se consumen en la Tierra.

Llega primero Pedro y le trae marihuana, lo prueban y listo; luego llega Juan, que tra�a PBC, y probaron.

Ya hab�an llegado todos los ap�stoles menos uno, cuando de pronto tocan la puerta, y Jes�s dice: “�Qui�n es?”

Y Judas, el apostol que faltaba, dice: “Abran la puerta carajo, todos se van al F.B.I.”