This chain letter was started in hopes of bringing relief to other tired and discouraged men. Unlike most chain letters, this one does not cost anything. Just send a copy of this letter to five of your friends who are equally tired and discontented. Then bundle up your wife or girlfriend and send her to the man whose name appears at the top of the following list and add your name to the bottom of the list. When your turn comes, you will receive 15,625 women. One of them is bound to be better than the one you already have. At the writing of this letter, a friend of mine had already received 184 women, of whom 4 were worth keeping. REMEMBER this chain brings luck. One man’s pit bull died and the next day he received a Playboy swimsuit model. An unmarried man living with his widowed mother was able to choose between a Hooters waitress and a Hollywood super model. You can be lucky too, but DO NOT BREAK THE CHAIN! One man broke the chain and got his own wife back again. Let’s keep it going, men! Just add your name to the list below! > Bill Clinton> 1600 Pennsylvania Ave> Washington DC>> William Jefferson Clinton> 1600 Pennsylvania Ave> Washington DC>> W. J. Clinton> 1600 Pennsylvania Ave> Washington DC>> William Clinton> 1600 Pennsylvania Ave> Washington DC>> W. Jefferson Clinton> 1600 Pennsylvania Ave> Washington DC>> William J. Clinton> 1600 Pennsylvania Ave> Washington DC>> Slick Willie Clinton> 1600 Pennsylvania Ave> Washington, DC>> Mr. Hillary Clinton> 1600 Pennsylvania Ave> Washington DC
Author: admin
Hi-tech Redneck
Backup – What you do when you run across a varmint in the woods.
Bug – The reason you give for calling in sick to work.
Byte – What your pitbull done to cousin Billy-Bob.
Chip – Cow pasture surprises that you try not to step in.
Terminal – When yer about to die.
Crash – When you go to Jethro’s party uninvited.
Digital – The art of counting on yer fingers.
Diskette – Female who dances the disco.
Fax – What you lie about to the IRS and yer wife.
Hacker – Uncle Willie after 32 years of smoking.
Hardcopy – Picture used to help you select a tattoos.
Internet – Where cafeteria ladies put their hair.
Keyboard – Where you hang the keys to yer John Deere.
Mac – Big John’s favorite fast food.
Megahertz – How your head feels after 13 beers.
Modem – What you do when the grass gets so high that it hides the pickup truck that you have on blocks in the front yard.
Mouse Pad – Where Mickey and Minnie call home.
Network – Scoopin’ a big fish before it breaks yer line.
ROM – Where the pope lives.
Screen – Keeps mosquitoes outta yer trailer.
Serial Port – A red wine you drink with yer breakfast.
Superconductor – The guy who yells “All Aboard” the loudest at a train station.
SCSI (pronounced scuzzi) – What you call your two-week-old underwear.
Out Golfing
There once was a man who was so fanatical about his golf game that he used to play every day without fail. One morning he had played the first hole and was just about to tee off on the second, when he saw the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen putting on the first.
The man waited until the woman had reached the second tee and asked if she would like to join him and they could finish the round together. To his surprise the woman agreed and they played the remaining holes. Not only was this woman beautiful, she was also a good golfer. When they completed their round, the man told the woman that he was a cordon bleu chef and wine buff.
He invited her back to his place for a meal and a few drinks. The woman accepted enthusiastically and off they went. Back at the house the man cooked a magnificent meal. In fact it was more than just cooking it was a performance do behold. They enjoyed good food, good wine and good conversation. The man was so taken by the beauty and skill of this woman and desired her no end.
He then asked if she would like to play golf the following morning, to which she agreed. Once again they enjoyed a great game of golf, a magnificent evening meal. This went on for three weeks when the lawyer finally said to the woman, “Listen, the golf and the company have been fantastic! But, there are only so many performances a man can take. When are we going to have sex?”
“We can’t,” said the woman.
“Why not?” came the reply.
“Because I’m a transvestite” replied the woman.
“YOU BITCH!” screamed the lawyer, “…I CAN’T BELIEVE that you’ve been playing off the LADIES TEE FOR THE LAST THREE WEEKS!”
Those who live closest arrive
Those who live closest arrive latest.
Men and Women
1. A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t want.
2. A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
3. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
4. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
5. Married men live longer than single men – but married men are a lot more willing to die.
6. Any married man should forget his mistakes – there’s no use in two people remembering the same thing.
7. Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
8. A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t. A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change and she does.
9. A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
10. There are two times when a man doesn’t understand a woman – before marriage and after marriage.
What should you give a man who has everything?…
What should you give a man who has everything?
– A woman to show him how to work it.
My Church
My church welcomes ALL denominations, but really prefers tens and twenties!
Have you ever asked your child a question too many
Well I hope you remember my story when they start getting frustrated.
My 3-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him
constantly.
One day we stoped at taco bell for a quick lunch in between errands, it was so
busy with a full dining room.
While enjoying my taco I smelled something funny so of course I checked my
7-year-old daughter and she was clean.
Then I realized that Matt had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him
and he said no!
I kept thinking, oh lord that child has had an accident and I didn’t have any
clothes with me.
Then I said, Matt are you sure you did not have an accident, he said, no mommy
it’s just gas.
I just knew that he must have had an accident cause the smell was getting
worse. SOOO I asked one more time MATT DID YOU HAVE AN ACCIDENT!
This time with a little smirk on his face he jumped up, and yanked down his
pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled, SEE MOM IT’S JUST GAS!!!!…
While 100 people nearly choked to death on their tacos he calmly pulled up his
pants and sat down to eat his food as if nothing happened.
I was mortified but some kind elderly people made me feel a lot better when
they came over and thanked me for the best laugh they had ever had.
En la playa dos amigas
En la playa dos amigas est�n conversando:
“�Oh, querida, has rebajado mucho!”
“Es que mi marido me est� enga�ando con otra mujer”.
“Entonces, �div�rciate!”
“�Por ahora, no, quiero rebajar diez libras m�s!”
Do You Know How Too
Man walks up to a farmers house, knocks on the door.
When a woman opened the door, the man ask if she knew how to have sex.
Not amused, she slammed the door.
Again, the man knocked, again, asked the same question.
Again, not amused , she screamed get the hell away.
Later, she told her husband of the incident. He said he would stay home the following day just in case.
Sure enough, the next day the same man returned. The husband hid with his gun while the lady answered the door.
When she was asked again if she knew how to have sex, she said yes.
The man replied, great, give some to your husband the next time you see him , and tell him to keep away from my wife.
love
one day walking on the street i saw a man love at first sight
Bar Trouble
A Guy Walked Into A bar …..
OUCH !!!!!