Author: admin

En el zoo de Bilbao, un chico se cae al foso de los leones y cuando estaban a punto de com�rselo, salta un joven y rescata al menor.

Los viandantes le felicitan, y aparece un equipo de audaces reporteros del EGIN para hacerle una entrevista:

EGIN: “Hola, buenas, �qu� ha ocurrido?”

“Pues que he visto que el chico ha ca�do al foso, y cuando he visto que no pod�a salir, me he lanzado a salvarlo”.

EGIN: “Vaya, desde luego eres todo un h�roe, t� eres de Bilbao �no?”

“Pues no, yo soy de Badajoz, y estoy aqu� porque me han trasladado de funcionario”.

EGIN: “Pero tu familia es de aqu� �no?”

“Pues no, todos est�n en Extremadura”.

EGIN: “Bueno, a pesar de eso est�s a favor de la Patria Vasca y de la independencia de Euskadi �no?”

“�No, no!, yo estoy a favor de una Espa�a… una grande y libre”.

EGIN: “Hummm… bien… vale… adi�s”.

Al d�a siguiente aparece en la portada del EGIN:

“ESC�NDALO: NUEVA AGRESI�N IMPERIALISTA

JOVEN NEONAZI QUITA LA COMIDA DE LA BOCA AL LE�N DEL ZOO

(Se estudia que se hayan podido usar fondos reservados del Ministerio del Interior)

CONVOCADA JUSTA MANIFESTACI�N DE PROTESTA”.

Estaban los temibles de la clase: Pablito,pepito y juanito y la tarea en clase era decir la mayor cantidad de palabras comenzadas por la letra P.

Dice la profesora: “!A ver Pablito dime tus palabras con P.”

Responde pablito: “Profesora, pap� pone pantuflas para pasear por Paris.”

Dice la profesora: “Muy bien Pablito.”

Toca el turno a Juanito: “Ah profe: Pedro Perez Prieto pobre pintor portugu�s pinta paisajes por poco precio.”

Dice la profesora: “Muy bien Juanito, pero ahora Pepito t� que nunca haces las tareas dime tus palabras con P.”

Comienza pepito: “Profesora Petra Pont�n Patillo pide Pepito palabras principiadas por P, par puntos prosigo, profesora Petra Ponton Pati�o pide permiso Pepito para peque�o polvito, pero Pepito pelao putamente prevenido pone preservativo pl�stico punta pip� para prevenir pre�ez prematura profesora Petra Pont�n Pati�o.

A blonde, brunet, and red head all went to heaven. When they entered the one rule for them to follow was to never step on a duck. Well the problem was that there was ducks everywhere. If you did step on a duck then you were chained to the uglyiest man in heaven. Well one day sure enough the blonde steps on a duck and she is chained to the uglyiest man in heaven. Well the brunet and the red head are getting along good. But one day the brunet steps on a duck and is chained to the second uglyiest man in heaven. Well after that the red head is espicially carefull and she never does step on a duck. But one day sudenly a very handsome man is chained to her and she asks what did I do to get such a privalige? And the man says I steped on a duck.

Good Communication Skills – Spends lots of time on phone

Average Employee – Not too bright

Exceptionally Well Qualified – Made no major blunders yet

Work Is First Priority – Too ugly to get a date

Active Socially – Drinks a lot

Family Is Active Socially – Spouse drinks, too

Independent Worker – Nobody knows what he/she does

Quick Thinking – Offers plausible excuses

Careful Thinker – Won’t make a decision

Aggressive – Obnoxious

Uses Logic On Difficult Jobs – Gets someone else to do it

Expresses Themselves Well – Speaks English

Meticulous Attention To Detail – A nit picker

Has Leadership Qualities – Is tall or has a loud voice

Exceptionally Good Judgment – Lucky

Keen Sense Of Humor – Knows a lot of dirty jokes

Career Minded – Back Stabber

Loyal – Can’t get a job anywhere else

A young man was taking a verbal test to join the local police force.The question asked, “If you were driving a police car, alone on a lonely road at night, and were being chased by a gang of criminals driving sixty miles an hour, what would you do?”The young man answered without a second’s thought: “Seventy!”

Comment, kids are the worst STD