This guy comes home from work.
He walks into his bedroom, and finds his wife in bed with 3 other men that he works with.
He says, “Hello, hello, hello.”
“What, aren’t you talking to me?” The wife retorts.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis
Author: admin
“It was hell,” recalls former
“It was hell,” recalls former child.
Joke found on http://www.randomjoke.com
Decoy
Staking out a notoriously rowdy bar for possible D.U.I. violators, a cop watched from his squad car as a fellow stumbled out the door, tripped on the curb and tried 45 cars before opening the door to his own and falling asleep on the front seat.
One by one, the drivers of the other cars drove off. Finally, the sleeper woke up, started his car and began to leave. The cop pulled him over and administered a Breathalyzer test. When the results showed a 0.0 blood-alcohol level, the puzzled policeman asked him how that was possible.
“Easy,” was the reply. “Tonight was my turn to be the decoy”
Choice your words
A man heard his wife talking to one of her friends,she was saying something about small,short and other words simular.that knight the man and woman were getting ready for bed and the man asked the woman if she was talking about him at all this evening?the woman said no, why?the man said when you reafer to me to your friends I wuold appreceate it if you would use words like large and big.the woman replied, ok.they continued to undress for bed,when the man got naked ,the woman said to the man It’s not very large is it?I thought it was bigger.
How Much Skin to Cover a Pussy
Q: How much skin does it take to cover a pussy?
A: (Stick out tongue)
Shopping for a Weddi
The Mother and daughter were shopping for the girl’s bridal gown. The Mother said, “Thank goodness, I’ll see you get married in white,” the Mother said.”Why’s that Mother ?” the daughter asked.”Well dear, to be honest, only a virgin should be married in a white gown; otherwise, lavender is used.””Oh!” replied the girl.”Well, how about a white gown with lavender trim?”
diarea is hereditary, it runs in you jeans…
diarea is hereditary, it runs in you jeans
First class
There is a blonde on a plane to New York. She is sitting in the first class section, but her ticket says that she should be in the coach section.
A flight attendant realizes the blonde’s mistake and asks her politely to move. The blonde won’t move.
She says, “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, and I’m going to New York.”
The flight attendant goes and tells all of the other flight attendants. They all try to persuade the blonde to move, but she won’t move.
She says again, “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, and I’m going to New York.”
The flight attendants go and tell the pilot about the obnoxious blonde. They tell him the only thing that she says. He puts the plane on auto-pilot and whispers something in the blonde’s ear.
Immediately, she gets up and moves to her normal seat. Then the pilot goes back to fly the plane. The flight attendants are all very curious about how the pilot made the blonde move so quickly.
They ask him and he says, “Oh, it was easy. All I had to do was tell her that the first class section wasn’t going to New York!”
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Christine
Choose a Political Party
During a neighborhood party, Joe got into an argument with his neighbor, about presidential politics. Finally, the neighbor asked me why Joe was such a dedicated Republican.
Joe told him that his father and grandfather were both Republicans and he was carrying on the family tradition.
“That’s it?” said the exasperated neighbor. “What if your father and grandfather had been horse thieves?”
“Well…” Joe replied, “I suppose then I’d be a Democrat like you.”
The mouse and the viagra
a mouse gets a viagra 3o mins later he comes out of his house ad says” right wheres that pussy now!”” by Ricky.L. Lewis
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Last Six Months
The middle aged man was visibly shaken when his Doctor advised that he had only 6 month’s to live because of the terminal disease that was detected during a recent physical check-up. The Doctor suggested that he should get his “house in order” , make sure his Will was current and ensure all final arrangements were in place for the funeral.
He should then make plans to enjoy what might be left of his life, to the fullest.
“What will you do for the last six months?” asked the Doctor.
His patient thought for a few minutes then replied, “I think I’ll go and live with my Mother-in-law”.
Surprised by the answer, the Doctor asked, “Of all people, why in the would you want to live with your Mother-in-law?”
“Because it’ll be the longest six months of my Life!”
Potatoes
A red head, a brunett and a blondy are busted at a crackhouse. They all run away into a convinience store and jump into three seperate bags. The policeman looks at the first bag with the brunett in it and it says, ruff, ruff, so he says, well it must be a dog. Then he looks at the second bag with the red head in it and it says, meow meow, so he says, well that must be a cat. Then he looks at the third bag with the blondy in it and it says, potatoes, so he arrests the blondy.