A really horny man walks into a whorehouse, but only has ten dollars. He walks up to the manager and says “What can I get for ten bucks?” The manager replies, “The only thing we got at that price is some old bag who’s been in the business for 50 years.” The man tells the manager that it will have to do and he is instructed to go into one of the bedrooms. After about five minutes the old lady appears and the guy starts screwin’ her. “Damn! he says you are really dry.” “Hold on,” she says and she walks into the bathroom. The old lady comes back out of the bathroom and they start up again. The guy goes “This is way better, what did you do?” The old lady replies, “I scratched my scabs.”
Author: admin
Gases
you suck greatly!
A Sex Riddle
A man went to bed with two women, how many ANIMALS were in the bed the next morning?
12…
3 asses
6 calves
2 pussies
and
1 dead cock!!!
Vanilla
A lady walks into a store and asks the clerk for a gallon of vanilla, a gallon of chocolate and a gallon of strawberries the clerk says i dont have any chocolate so the lady says ok ill take a quart of each and the clerk tells her again i dont have any chocolate so the lady asks for a pint of each and now the clerk is getting really mad and he tells her to spell the “van” in vanilla so she goes v-a-n so the clerk goes spell the stracw in strawberries so she goes s-t-r-a-w and the clerk goes spell the fuck in chocolate and the lady goes there is no fuckin chocolate and the clrek goes thats what i’ve been trying to tell you!
gays
There were these three gay guys going at it one night, and they
run out of vasaline. So the first guy says “hey dont do anything
until i get back from the store” so the other two said “alright
we’ll wait”
So upon returning from the store the man notices that there is
vasaline all over the place. He says “I thought you guys
promised not to do anything until i got back!” The second guy
goes “We didnt” so the first guy says “then what is all this on
the walls?” upon syaing this the third guy steps up and says “I
farted”
Murphy’s Technology Laws…
- Murphy’s Technology Laws
- We don’t know one millionth of one percent about anything.
Your momma
you look just like your momma but your momma but ses ugly.
Pig Under Her Arm
Q: A blonde is walking down the street with a pig under her arm. She
passes a person who asks, “Where did you get that?”
A: The pig says, “I won her in a raffle!”
Playing Doctor
Morris complained to his friend Irving, that love making with his wife was becoming routine and boring.
“Get creative Morris. Break up the monotony. Why don’t you try ‘playing doctor’ for an hour? That’s what I do,” said Irving.
“Sounds great,” Morris replied, “but how do you make it last for an hour?”
“Just keep her in the waiting room for 45 minutes!”
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by ���rt��
Bald Mama
Your mama is so bald when she braids her hair it looks like
stitches!
Entra un se�or corriendo a
Entra un se�or corriendo a una farmacia y pide:
“�R�pido, deme algo para la diarrea, pero ya!”
El encargado de la farmacia, que era nuevo en el negocio, se pone un tanto nervioso y le da sin fijarse unas pastillas. El tipo, con la urgencia, se las toma y se va. Momentos despu�s, el encargado de la farmacia se da cuenta de que por error e inexperiencia le dio al hombre unas pastillas para los nervios. Horas despu�s regresa nuevamente el diarreico y el farmac�utico le dice:
“�Mil disculpas, se�or, f�jese que por error le di un medicamento para los nervios en lugar de alg�n antidiarr�ico! Pero d�game, �c�mo se siente usted?”
“Cagao, pero tranquilo”.
*Who cares?*
Q: Why do blonde girls have trouble achieving orgasm?
A: *Who cares?*