Author: admin

Una pareja de homosexuales, ya formalizados, estaban durmiendo juntos. Uno le dice al otro:

“�Ay, mi amor! Hoy amanec� con un dolor en el culo, rev�same para ver que tengo”.

“No, mejor vamos a que te revise un m�dico”.

“No, no, rev�same t�. M�teme un dedo para que me revises”, insiste aquel.

Entonces, el otro le mete el dedo y dice que no siente nada.

“Pero, revisa bien. Mete tres dedos”, insiste.

Y el otro mete los tres dedos y dice que no siente nada.

“Entonces, mete la mano”.

El otro mete la mano al tiempo que dice:

“Pues sigo sin sentir nada… Ah, espera creo que siento algo. Es un anillo”.

“�Feliz cumplea�os a ti! �Feliz cumplea�os…!”

Joe wanted to buy a motorbike. He doesn’t have much luck until, one day, he comes across a Harley with a ‘for sale’ sign on it.

The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old. It is shiny and in absolute mint condition.

He immediately buys it, and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years.

“Well, it’s quite simple, really,” says the seller, “whenever the bike is outside and it’s going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It protects it from the rain.”

And he hands Joe a jar of Vaseline.

That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her parents. Naturally, they take the bike there.

But just before they enter the house, Sandra stops him and says, “I have to tell you something about my family before we go in.”

“When we eat dinner, we don’t talk. In fact, the first person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes.”

“No problem,” he says. And in they go.

Joe is shocked. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes.

In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes.

They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word.

As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation.

So he leans over and kisses Sandra.

No one says a word.

So he reaches over and fondles her breasts.

Still, nobody says a word.

So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the table, and screws her right there, in front of her parents.

His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word.

He looks at her mom. “She’s got a great body,” he thinks. So he grabs the mom, bends her over the dinner table, and has his way with her every which way right there on the dinner table.

Now his girlfriend is furious and her dad is boiling, but still, total silence.

All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain.

Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket.

Suddenly the father backs away from the table and shouts, “All right, thats enough, I’ll do the fucking dishes!”

Submitted by sai1ram
Edited by Curtis, yisman and Calamjo

Cierto dia un tontito anda por las calles del la capital, observando los edificios y comienza a contar los pisos de uno, entonces llegan dos chilangos y le dicen:

“Oiga, �qu� est� haciendo?”

A lo que �l les reponde:

“Pues estoy contando los pisos de ese edificio.”

“Ah, que no conoce las leyes de M�xico?”

“Pues no.”

“Pues f�jese que hay una ley que dice que por cada piso de un edificio que alguien cuente, pagar� un peso, �cu�ntos cont�?”

“36.”

“Bueno, son 36 pesos.”

El hombre les paga y los dos se van por su lado. Al irse ellos el tontito dice:

“�Ja, los hice pendejos, cont� 38!”