Someone was having a brain transplant and they wanted to view
all the choices. There was an American brain which was for
$100.00. And a blonde’s brain for $2,000,000. The patient asked
why the blonde’s brain was so expensive. The doctor replied,
“Well you see, the blonde’s brain has never been used before!”
Author: admin
Information Please
A young man called information. “I’d like the number for Jennifer Smith in Atlanta,” he said.
“There are multiple listings for that name,” said the operator. “Do you have a street name?”
“Well, uhhhh,” said the young man, “most people just call me Bubba.”
�Cu�l es el verdadero n�mero
�Cu�l es el verdadero n�mero de la bestia?
660: el n�mero de la Bestia… aproximadamente.
DCLXVI: el n�mero de la Bestia romana.
0,666: el n�mero de la MiliBestia.
/ 666: denominador com�n bestial.
666-1: n�mero imaginario de la Bestia.
1010011010: n�mero de la Bestia binaria.
6, mmm… �me lo puede repetir? (una modelo Bestia)
1-600: caracter�stica telef�nica de la Bestia.
0666: c�digo postal de la Bestia.
0-600-1-0666: la Hot-Line de la Bestia.
$6,66: valor por minuto de la Hot-Line de la Bestia.
$665,95: precio de la Bestia al contado, o 12 cuotas de $66,60.
$710,35: precio de la Bestia m�s I.V.A.
6,66%: impuesto al valor agregado Bestial.(I.V.A.)
$806,66: precio de la Bestia con accesorios y gastos de env�o.
$506,66: precio de la Bestia… sin factura.
Ruta 666: el camino de la Bestia.
6,66 mg: dosis m�nima diaria de la Bestia.
Lotus 6-6-6: base de datos de la Bestia.
Word 6.66: procesador de texto para Bestias.
i66686: el CPU Bestial. En vez de Pentium, Pandem�nium.
666i: el BMW de la Bestia.
333: Medio Bestia.
600: Fiat de la Bestia cuando era joven.
666 kg: un gordo bestial.
Rocky 666: la saga cinematogr�fica bestial.
6+6=6: �Pero qu� Bestia!
Seis, Sex, Sexo… las Bestias solo piensan en ‘eso’.
Truly incredible dog
This fundamentalist Christian couple felt it important to own an equally fundamentally Christian pet. So, they went shopping. At a kennel specializing in this particular breed, they found a dog they liked quite a lot. When they asked the dog to fetch the Bible, he did it in a flash. When they instructed him to look up Psalm 23, he complied equally fast, using his paws with dexterity. They were impressed, purchased the animal, and went home (piously, of course). That night they had friends over. They were so proud of their new fundamentalist dog and his major skills, they called the dog and showed off a little. The friends were impressed, and asked whether the dog was able to do any of the usual dog tricks, as well. This stopped the couple cold, as they hadn’t thought about ‘normal’ tricks. “Well,” they said, “let’s try this out.” Once more they called out to the dog, and then clearly pronounced the command, “Heel!” Quick as a wink, the dog jumped up, put his paw on the man’s forehead, closed his eyes in concentration, and bowed his head.
Arbitrator ar’-bi-tray-ter:
Arbitrator ar’-bi-tray-ter: A cook that leaves Arby’s to work at McDonald’s.Avoidable uh-voy’-duh-buhl: What a bullfighter tries to do.Baloney buh-lo’-nee: Where some hemlines fall.
Motor Pool Phonecall
The phone rang at the motor pool and an authoritative voice demanded to know how many vehicles were operational.
Jim answered, “We’ve got twelve trucks, ten utilities, three staff cars and that Bentley the big fat Colonel swanks around in.”
There was a stony silence for a second or two.
“Do you know who you are speaking to?”
“No,” said Jim.
“It is the so-called big fat colonel you so insubordinately referred to.”
“Well, do you know who you are talking to?”
“No,” roared the colonel.
“Well thank goodness for that!,” Jim said as he hung up the phone.
Breast implants
It is being reported that over 500 female soldiers have gotten free breast implants while in the service and that’s while Bush was president.
Imagine how many there were under Clinton.
-Jay Leno
Saddam’s doubles
The good news and the bad news for Saddam’s doubles…
All eight of Saddam Hussein’s body doubles were gathered in a bunker in
downtown Baghdad.
Tariq Aziz, the Deputy Prime Minister, walked in and said, “I’ve got good news
and bad news. The good news is that Saddam is still alive, so you all still have
a job.”
One of the doubles spoke up and said, “what’s the bad news”?
“He’s lost an arm.”
In Common
What do a woman and a condom have in common?They both spend too much time in your wallet and not enough time on your dick.
Knock KnockWho’s there?Sicily!Sicily who?Sicily question!
Knock KnockWho’s there?Sicily!Sicily who?Sicily question!
Rein Him In
The newlywed couple asked the hotel desk clerk for a room and told him they just got married that morning.
“Congratulations!” said the clerk looking at the bride. “Would you like the bridal then?”
“No thanks,” said the woman.
“I’ll just hold him by the ears until he gets the hang of it!”
This morning, National Public Radio
This morning, National Public Radio reported that Monica Lewinsky had
been in an accident with her Sport Utility Vehicle. Immediately, four
things came to my mind:
- She must have blown a rod.
- Obviously, her driving sucks too.
- It’s not the first time she flipped over something with a spare tire.
- I wonder how badly this accident stained her dress?