Your momma is so skinny she layed down and dissapeared
Author: admin
Yo Momma
Yo Momma is so stupid, she planted Cheerios in the garden thinkin they were doughnut seeds!!!!
STUPID
YOUR SO STUPID YOU GOT STABBED IN A SHOOT OUT
Three drunken men
These three guys got together one day and were talking about how drunk they
got at a party the night before.
The first guy said, ”Man I was so drunk last night I went home and blew
chunks.”
The second guy said, ”Man that was nothing I was so drunk last night I was
driving home and I got my DWI.”
The third guy says, “Man that was nothing. I was so drunk last night I was
driving home and I picked up a prostitute and my wife caught us in bed.”
Then the first guy said, ”No — you guys don’t understand! Chunks are my
dogs!”
Rotten cherries
A woman was feelin’ some pinchin’ pains in her “you know what.”
So she went to a doctor and said, “I have pains. What are they?”
The doctor said, “Honey, you’ve got crabs.”
The girl said, “How could that be? I’m a virgin.”
The doctor repeated, “Believe me, you’ve got crabs.”
She went to another doctor and he said the same thing.
However, the third doctor she went to had a different diagnosis.
He said, “Honey, you don’t have crabs! Your cherries are rotten!”
Submitted by Curtis
Edited dolly04
Wedding Vows for women
You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and eventually will be used against you.
You have the right to an attourny, if you cannot affod one, you`ve been married before.
You may now kiss the bride…..s ass.
Sad life
How do you know you’re leading a sad life?
When a nymphomaniac tells you, “Let’s just be friends.”
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
Men vs. Women on Aging
Two old guys were sitting in the park, talking, when the subject turned to getting older. The first guy said, “Women have all the luck when it comes to getting older.””What do you mean?” asked the second guy.”Well,” replied the first. “I can barely remember the last time I was able to get it up in bed, but my wife is healthier than ever!””Healthier? How is that?” his buddy wondered.”Years ago, when we were younger, almost every night before bed she’d get these terrible headaches.” He answered. “Now that we’re older, she hasn’t had a headache in years.”
Music joke
Q: What do you get when you play a new age song backwards?A: A new age song.
Wandering mind
Why is it dangerous to let your man’s mind wander?
It’s too little to be out alone.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Yisman
Affair with a Dentis
Laura fell for her handsome new dentist like a ton of bricks and pretty soon had lured him into a series of passionate encounters in the dental clinic after hours. But one day he said sadly, “Laura, honey, we have to stop seeing each other. Your husband’s bound to get suspicious.” “No way, sweetie, he’s dumb as a post,” she assured him.”Besides, we’ve been screwing for six months now and he doesn’t suspect a thing.””True,” agreed the dentist, “but you’re down to one tooth!”
12 and 5 season
The Cowboys had a 12 and 5 season this year, 12 arrests, 5 convictions.