Author: admin

There once were these three guys who died and went to hell. The
first guy was a drunk. The second guy was a player and the third
was a pot-head.When the three guys ended up in hell they begged
and pleaded with the devil ti spare them. The devil said,” I
will allow you all to be locked in a room for 1,000 years with
anything you want. However you may not come out for those 1,000
years.” The guys thought that this was great! So the drunk says
to the devil,” I want to be locked in a room with all the beer
in the world!” So the drunk was put into a room for a 1,000
years with all the beer in the world. Then the player says to
the devil,” I want to be locked in a room with all the women in
the world!” So the devil lockes him in a room for 1,000 years
with all the women in the world. Then the pot-head says to the
devil,” I want to be locked in a room with all the pot in the
world!!!!”. So sure enough the devil locks him up with all the
pot in the world for 1,000 years. So 1,000 years go by and the
devil unlocks the rooms. The first room is the drunk mans room.
when the devil opens it the drunk says,” Urgh. I never want to
see beer again!!!”. then the devil moves on and opens the
players door. when he opens the door the player says,” Man i
hate women! All they do is complain and bitch about shit!! i
never want to see women again!!!” then the devil moves on to the
next door, wich is the pot-heads door. the devil opends it and
sees the the pot un smoked. then in the middle of the room is
the pot-head, crying. the guy looks at the devil and says,” do
you have a light?”

En una calle de Sevilla, en pleno agosto, a las cinco de la tarde, con 40� C a la sombra, una multitud se agolpa en un portal. En frente, un se�or en cambio se tuesta al sol. Una viejecita, sorda casi totalmente, al pasar queda sorprendida de toda la gente all� presente y pregunta:

“Perdone, �me podr�a decir que hace tanta gente aqu�?”

“S�, claro, es que se ha muerto Roberto, un viajante. Lo van a llevar ahora al cementerio”.

“�Qu� dice joven, qu� aqu� viv�a un gigante?”

“Un gigante no, un viajante, un vendedor…”

“Ya, ya le he entendido. �Y estaba casado el gigante?”

“S�, se�ora, estaba casado, pero no era un gigante, era un VIAJANTE”.

“�No me grite, joven! �E hijos, ten�a hijos el gigante?”

“S�, un ni�o y una ni�a, pero no era gigante, era VIAJANTE, un vendedor…”

“Ya, ya, ya s� que era gigante… �Qu� pena de muchachos!”

“�Se�ora, que es un VIAJANTE!”

En esto, sale por la puerta del portal el ata�d con el cuerpo del viajante y, la se�ora fij�ndose que es un f�retro de tama�o normal le reprocha:

“Oiga, �y en ese ata�d va el gigante?”

“No, se�ora, ah� va su pene, el gigante viene detr�s”

Llega un indio a un bar y pide un whisky. El camarero le da un whisky y dice:

“Whisky no gustar, whisky no pagar.”

El camarero le da otro whisky y el indio responde:

“Whisky no gustar, whisky no pagar.”

Esto ocurre sucesivamente durante cinco veces, hasta que el camarero, totalmente harto le echa gasolina en el whisky.

“Whisky si gustar, whisky s� pagar.”

Llega al d�a siguiente el indio, y el camarero le pregunta que si quer�a otro whisky como el del d�a anterior. El indio responde:

“No, yo pegar peo, matar caballo.”