Author: admin

A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor’s office.

After his check up, the doctor called the wife into his office alone.

He said, “Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don’t do the following, your husband will surely die.”

“Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant at all times. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him.

Don’t burden him with chores. Don’t discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse.

No nagging. And most importantly, make love with your husband several times a week. If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely.”

On the way home, the husband asked his wife. “What did the doctor say?”

�He said you’re going to die,” she replied.

Est�n en la escuela y les dice la maestra:

“A ver ni�os, para ma�ana me van a traer una adivinanza de pelotas ehhh de pelotas.”

Ya llega el otro d�a y dice: “A ver, Juanito, tu adivinanza.”

“Mire, maestra, es una pelota as� de grande que tiene hex�gonos y se patea.”

“Una pelota de futbol.”

“A ver Pedrito, tu adivinanza.”

“Mire, maestra, es una pelota as� de chiquita, es verde y se le pega con una raqueta.”

“�Una de tennis!”

“A ver, cubanita, dame tu adivinanza.”

“mi’e maetra e una pelota ai e grande peluita peluita peluita.”

“…”

“S�, maetra e una pelota ai e grande peluita peluita peluita.”

“No pues me doy cubanita.”

“E una pelota e vaque.”

“�Una pelota de basket?”

“S�, maetra e una pelota e vaque.”

“No te creo.”

“Mire maetra: A ver vazques enhe�ale las pelotas a la maetra.”

Three Boy Scouts, a lawyer, a priest, and a pilot are in a plane that is about to crash.

The pilot says “Well, we only have 3 parachutes, let’s give them to the 3 Boy Scouts. They are young and have their whole lives in front of them.”

The lawyer says, “Fuck the Boy Scouts!”

The priest asks, “Do we have time?”

Submitted by calamjo
Edited by yisman