How do amish find thier sheep in tall grass?
very satisfying..
Author: admin
Clinton bumps into a new intern
Clinton bumps into a new intern in the hall. He stops, stares at her a moment
and then asks “are you new her?”
The intern replies “Why yes, I am, this is my second day.”
“I thought so,” said Clinton�, I didn’t think I had cum across your face
before…”
Yo mama is so fat
Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps she pulls down the bridge too
Unfertilized.
What do you call a brunette with a blonde on either side?
An interpreter.
Left behind
On landing, the stewardess said, “Please be sure to take all of your belongings.
If you’re going to leave anything, please make sure it’s something we’d like to have.”
Octopus
Girl: Do you know what family the octopus belongs to?
Boy: No one in our street.
Cierta noche iba caminando un
Cierta noche iba caminando un gay por la calle, cuando de repente aparece un ladr�n y amenaz�ndolo con un cuchillo le dice:
“Manos arriba.”
El gay, asustado, le responde:
“�Ay no, mejor patas al hombro!”
Sex Pills
There once was a man who could not keep it going with his wife.He went to the doctor who gave him some sex pills. There was a label on the bottle that said “Take one pill for a great night.” The man thought that he wanted a stupendous night so he downed the whole bottle.In the morning the neighbors came over to find the man’s son sitting on the porch crying.”What’s wrong?” they said. The boy replied, “Mom’s dead, sister’s pregnant, my butt hurts and dad’s in the basement yelling ‘here kitty”
There are more jokes like this at http://www.dirtylaughs.com
Slow cop
A woman was driving her old beat up car on the highway with her 7 year old son.
She tried to keep up with traffic but they were flying by her.
After getting caught in a large group of cars flying down the road, she looked at her speedometer to see she was doing 15 miles over the speed limit.
Slowing down, she moved over to the side and got out of the clump that soon left her behind.
She looked up and saw the flashing lights of a police car.
Pulling over she waited for the officer to come up to her car. As he did he said, “Ma’am do you know why I pulled you over?”
Her son piped up from the back seat, “I do… because you couldn’t catch the other cars!”
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Calamjo
The Night Before Y2K
Twas the night before Y2K
and all through the house
we all were in hiding,
me, my kids, and my spouse.
The firewood piled
floor to ceiling with care
the cupboards all packed
with non-perishables to spare.
The windows were barred
to protect us from looters
our new generator is safe
`cause it has no computers.
We’ve bought lots of gold
should the dollar collapse
and run up those credit cards
right to the max
and just in case
the banks should all crash
we closed our account
and spent all the cash
on dried foods and water
for our Y2K stash.
As the clock ticked toward midnight
we knew we’d soon learn
the doomsayers were right
it would all crash and burn.
Stretched out in my chair
with my gun in my lap
I decided to take a pre-Y2K nap.
I fell fast asleep
and then, without warning
I opened my eyes
and it was new year’s morning!
The lights were still on
the TV worked too
on all the news channels
there was nothing so new.
The only news
that sounded so bad
was the realization
I’d been Y2K-had.
What I thought was survival
was now but a fad.
Shorty
Your so short you took a suecide jump off the curb
Tomcat
A technology buff, Mel spent hours pouring over the ad in ‘Popular Engineering’ for a ball-bearing mousetrap.
He tried to figure out how it could possibly work, then finally gave up and sent for one.
A week later, a tomcat arrived via parcel post.
Submitted by Calamjo
Edited by Curtis