A blonde shot an arrow into the air and missed!
Author: admin
Kiddie Wisdom 2
* Even though its a cool idea, grape jelly cannot substitute for toothpaste.
* When your Mom is mad at your dad, don’t let her brush your hair.
* If you bring your favorite book into the bathtub with you, it WILL get wet.
* Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
* You can’t trust dogs to watch your food.
* Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.
* Don’t sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
* Puppies still have bad breath even after eating tic tacs.
* Never hold a dust buster and a cat at the same time.
* School lunches stick to the wall.
*You can’t hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
* Don’t wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
* The best place to be when you are sad is in Grandma’s lap.
Good Catholic Girl
Sister Catherine was asking all the Catholic school children in fourth grade what they want to be when they grow up.Little Sheila says, “When I grow up, I want to be a prostitute!”Sister Catherine’s eyes grow wide and she barked, “What did you say?!” “A prostitute!” Sheila repeated.Sister Catherine breathed a sight of relief and saying, “Thank God! I thought you said a Protestant”
Worry
What�s the difference between worry and panic?
About 28 days.
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Calamjo
En plena borrachera un borracho
En plena borrachera un borracho le dice a otro:
“�En qu� se parece una hormiga a un elefante?”
El otro le responde: “No s�.”
“En que hormiga se escribe con H.”
“�Pero elefante que tiene que ver si elefante no lleva H?”
“S� lleva H.”
“No lleva.”
“S� lleva.”
“�Y por qu� lleva H?”
“Porque el elefante se llama Humberto.”
Iraqui Cruise
An Iraqui was walking on the beach when he was approached by a man. “Say Buddy,” said the man, “How”d you like to take a cruise for $100?”
“Sure!” exclaimed the Iraqui. When he gave the man his money, the guy pulled out a black jack and hit him over the head. He pulled him down to the shore, put him in an inner tube and then shoved him off.
The next day, another Iraqui was walking on the beach, and was approached by the same man, in the same manner. Sure enough, when the second Albanian gave him his money, out came the black jack, and the second Albanian was on his way out to sea.
Several days had passed, and the two Iraquis eventually ran into one another. “Hey Buddy,” the second asked the first, “do they serve drinks on this cruise?”
“They probably won’t.” said the first, “They didn’t last year.”
Horse in a bar
Horse walks into a bar.
The bar tender looks up and asks him, “Why the long face?”
Littil hump her faster
one time there was a littel boy name humpherfaster . and his dad was the presable to his school . his teather said if u need any thing raise your hand so hump her faster raised his hand . so his teaher asked what do u need humpherfaster take off your klothes no i will have my daddy fire u then the teacher said ok . humperherfaster raisd his so the teacher said what . walk to my house the teacher said no . humpherfaster said i will have my daddy fire u so the teacher said ok they get in bed his dad walks in and says humpherfaster humpherfaster replie im humping her as fast as i can
Beauty!
Two fellows have been at the bar now for quite a while, downing several mugs with abandon. They both look at the far end of the bar, in the direction of an unattractive woman who came in a while back.
The first fellow looks back at the second fellow and says, “Ya know, that woman is looking better and better, isn’t she?”
The second fellow takes another look at the woman, then looks back at his friend and says, “well, I guess what they say is true, then, eh?”
The first fellow asks, “Well, what DO they say?” The second fellow answers, “Beauty is in the eye of the beer-holder!”
Q. Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio?…
Q. Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio?
A. It took her a month to realize she could play it at night.
The odds are a million
The odds are a million to one
against my being one in a million.
-Ashleigh Brilliant
A corny blonde joke
Okay, so this blonde is driving by in his red sports car, and he sees
another blonde rowing with oars in a cornfield.
Well, he is just absolutely furious and he gets out of the car and yells to
the blonde in the cornfield: “Hey, if I knew how to swim, I’d go right out
there and give you a piece of my mind!”