A man came staggering into a bar and said, I want a drink. the bartender said,
forget it guy, you�re too drunk, just go on home. the man refused to leave, so
the bartender threw him out. the man crawled around on the ground till he
finally got on his feet and staggered around to the side door and came into the
bar again. the bartender grabbed him and threw him out
again. The man finally got on his feet again and staggered around to the back
of the bar and came in the back door of the bar. The bartender grabbed the man
and threw him out again. The man looked up from the ground at the bartender and
said in a slurred voice, tell me mister, do you work in every freaking bar in
this town?
Author: admin
Every Party Needs a Pooper
Why did the elephant bring toilet paper to a party?
Becase he was a party pooper.
El Presidente chino va a
El Presidente chino va a la Casa Blanca a un coctel presidencial. Clinton le presenta a su esposa Hillary y como hay una orquesta y pista de baile, el chino invita cort�smente a la primera dama a bailar una pieza.
Mientras est�n bailando una pieza lenta el chino se le pega bien a Hillary e, inevitablemente, tiene una erecci�n.
Hillary al sentir el bulto grita por ayuda: “�ESCOLTA! �ESCOLTA!”
A lo que el Presidente chino contesta: “�ES COLTA PELO GOLDA!”
Cinese man
a man phoned a chinese up and said do u deliver the chinese man said no we do chicken and steak
Don’t jump!
Q. – How do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed?
A. – Put velcro on the ceiling.
Home-coming
After the end of the finnish war, a young female reporter from a british
newspaper was sent to finland to write an article about the soldiers
home-coming. she had interviewed half a dozen, when she met pokka on the street.
“excuse me,” she said “but were you in the war?”
“yah, i was in the infantry.”
“would you mind to answer a few questions for a newspaper article?”
“ned, i wouldn’t mind at all.”
“when you came home, when the war was over, what was the first thing you did?”
“i f***** my wife.” pokka said bluntly. the journalist went crimson, and
tried desperately to change the subject.
“after that. i mean, what you did after that?”
“i f***** her again.” he answered. if possible the journalist turned even
redder, and got even more desperate to change the subject.
“other than that! uh – what did you do when you was finished with all that?!”
“then i untapped my skis and my heavy backpack.”
Because it was the chicken�s day off.
Q: Why did the dog cross the road?
A: Because it was the chicken�s day off.
Yo momma’s so stupid
Yo momma;s so srupid when she took the I.Q.test it came outd negitive.
Two Wishes
After 30 years of marriage an Italian woman addressed her
husband one evening. “For 30 years I’ve done everything you
asked of me without complaint. Now after 30 years I wish to ask
two things of you so that I may be even happier in my old age.”
“What are they?” asked the husband.
“My love, you always pick your nose,” replied the wife, “and I
wish that you would not do that.”
“And the other thing?” inquired the husband.
“Whenever we have sex, you always are on the top and I would
really like to be on the top of you sometimes.”
“Well, my dear,” said the husband, “I have tried, as you have to
make our marriage good, and foremost in my mind I have kept the
words of your father when we were betrothed. He said only two
things to me. First, he said, ‘Now you marry my daughter make
sure you always keep your nose clean.’ And second he said, ‘And
don’t fuck up.'”
Computer scientists do it recursively….
Computer scientists do it recursively.
Never trust anyone who always
Never trust anyone who always tells the truth.
Ur mam
ur mums so fat she uses the equator as a belt 🙂