Author: admin

one day a man came to a new town, wentto the library and said, “could i havea book on butterflys. i loooove butterflys.”” the librarian screamed “”satan is here! everybody get him!”” so he ran & ran to the mueseum & said “” do you have a butterfly exibit?i loooove butterflys.”” the man says “”satan is here! everybody get him!”” and the man runs and runs. then he goes to a bar & the bartender says “”you look like you got a problem. wanna talk about it?”” the man says “”all day i’v been trying to find stuff about butterflys and everyone calls me satan and chases me away.”” then the man gets chased out into the street and gets hit by a car. what’s the morel of this story? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > always look both ways before crossing the street. DUH!

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Top Signs That You ( Or Someone You Know) Is A Real Loser!

1. Your dog would rather play fetch by itself.

2. All the numbers in your little black book start with “1-900.”

3. Due to excessive hazing and ridicule, you decided to drop out of the Day Lilly Society.

4. Your ticket was chosen in a raffle, but you’d put it in your mouth and chewed all the numbers off.

5. You’re over 10 and still have imaginary friends.

6. Your personal ad reads: “Seeking Anybody.”

7. Every time you blow a bubble, you get gum all over your face.

8. You look forward to the dinner time calls from telemarketers.

9. The last time you were invited to a party, you grooved to the lyric, “Put your right foot in, take your right foot out.”

10. You spent last summer following around the 2000 Bible Belt Trekkie Convention Tour.

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car. Both could
barely see over the dashboard.

As they were cruising along they came to an intersection. The
stoplight was red but they just went on through.

The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, “I must be
losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light.”

After a few more minutes they came to another intersection and
the light was red again, and again they went right though.

This time the woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that
the light had been red but was really concerned that she was
losing it.

She was getting nervous, and decided to pay very close attention
to the road, and the next intersection to see what was going on.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely
red and they went right through and she turned to the other
woman and said, “Mildred! Don’t you know we just ran through
three red lights in a row! You could have killed us!”

Mildred turned to her and said “OH SHIT!!! Am I driving?”

An old priest got sick of everyone in his parish confessing adultery. During
one Sunday’s sermon he told them, “If one more person confesses to adultery,
I’ll quit!”

Since everyone liked him, they decided to use a code word: “fallen.” >From
then on, anyone who had committed adultery said they had “fallen.” This
satisfied the old priest and the parishioners, and everything was fine for
years, until finally the old priest passed away at the ripe old age of 93.

Shortly after the new young priest settled in, he paid a call on the mayor.
The priest was quite concerned. “You have to do something about the sidewalks in
this town, Mayor. You can’t believe how many people come into the confessional
talking about having fallen!” The mayor started to laugh, realizing that no one
had explained their code word to the new priest.

But before the mayor could explain, the priest shook his finger at the mayor
and said, “I don’t know why you’re laughing; your wife fell three times last
week!”