What did one fag say to the other fag in the bar? Can I push your stool?
Author: admin
Doctor in Charge
A new nurse listened while Dr. Bryce was yelling, “Typhoid! Tetanus! Measles!”
The new nurse asked another nurse, “Why is he doing that?”
The other nurse replied, “Oh, he just likes to call the shots around here.”
A man was helping one of his cows
A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 4-year-old
son standing wide-eyed at the fence, soaking in the whole event. The man
thought, “Great… he’s 4 and I’m going to have to start explaining the birds
and the bees. No need to jump the gun – I’ll just let him ask, and I’ll answer.”
After everything was over, the man walked over to his son and said, “Well son,
do you have any questions?” “Just one,” gasped the still wide-eyed lad. “How
fast was that calf going when he hit that cow?”
Bad Month for Car Saleman
Two car salesmen were sitting at the bar. One complained to the other, “Boy, business sucks. If I don’t sell more cars this month, I’m going to lose my fucking ass.”Too late he noticed a beautiful blonde sitting two stools away.Immediately, he apologized for his bad language.”That’s okay,” the blonde replied, “If I don’t sell more ass this month, I’m going to lose my fucking car.”
Pepito ve a su anciana
Pepito ve a su anciana vecina caminar por la calle y exclama:
“�Ah, pero usted tiene dos pies, do�a Rufina!”
“�Claro que s�, Pepito! �Y a qu� viene esta observaci�n?”
“Es que mi pap� me dijo que usted ten�a un pie en el otro mundo”.
La Machine….
La Machine.
…vegetables…vvrrrrr…
La Machine.
…fruits…vvrrrrr…
La Machine.
…little children…No mommy, No!…vvrrrrr…
La Machine.
Nothing is ever as simple
Nothing is ever as simple as it seems.
The Matling Bull
A man takes his wife to the stock show. They start heading
down the alley that had the bulls. They come up to the first
bull and his sign stated, “This bull mated 50 times last
year.” The wife turns to her husband and says, “He mated 50
times in a year, you could learn from him.”
They proceed to the next bull and his sign stated, “This bull
mated 65 times last year.” The wife turns to her husband and
says, “This one mated 65 times last year. That is over 5
times a month. You can learn from this one also.”
They proceeded to the last bull and his sign said, “This bull
mated 365 times last year.” The wife’s mouth drops open and
says, “WOW! He mated 365 times last year. That is ONCE A
DAY! You could really learn from this one.”
The man turns to his wife and says, “Go up and inquire if it
was 365 times with the same cow.”
English Channel
A blonde woman competed with a brunette and redheaded woman in the Breast Stroke division of an English Channel swim competition.The brunette came in first, the redhead second.The blonde woman finally reached shore completely exhausted.After being revived with blankets and coffee, she remarked; “I don’t want to complain, but I think those other two girls used their arms.”
Knock Knock 152
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Ray!
Ray who?
Rayders of the Lost Ark!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Raymond!
Raymond who?
Raymond me way to buy some sweets!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Razor!
Razor who?
Razor hands, this is a stick up!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Reagan!
Reagan who?
Reagan maniac!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Red!
Red who?
Red peppers. Isn’t that a hot one!
Two days
Teacher: Farai, what are the two days of the week, which start with letter
“T”?
Farai: Today and tomorrow Sir.
Triplets
A blonde had just given birth to triplets. Her friend had told
her to call her as soon as the baby was born. So the new mother
rang up her pal immediately and asked her to come.
As soon as the friend saw the babies she shrieked, “They’re
adorable!”
“Hmmm,” the blonde said, “I know, it’s difficult to pick which
one I should keep.”