Q:What’s the difference between a golf ball and a “G-Spot”?
A:A bloke will spend 20 minutes looking for a golf ball!!
Author: admin
Rape
A man and his wife go to their weekend getaway in the mountains where the husband likes to fish and the wife likes to read
the husband came home early one day from fishing and went to bed
the wife decided now would be her chance to go out on the boat and read
so she did
she didn’t know the lake very well so she just layed anchor anywhere and began to read
along came a officer and told her “what are you doing?”
“reading” said the woman
“this is a restricted fishing area”
“but i’m not fishing”
“that may be true but you have all of the equipment so i will have to take you in”
“if you do that i will charge you with rape” the woman says
“but i didn’ touch you”
“this may be true but you have all of the right equipment”
Moral of the story is: never mess with a woman who knows how to read.
Gods creates a black man
what did god say when he created the first black man?
danm… i burnt one
Husband’s Request
A pregnant woman with her first child, paid a visit to her obstetrician’s office. After the exam, she shyly said, “My husband wants me to ask you something…”, to which the doctor replies “I know…I know…” placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “I get asked that all the time. Sex is fine until late in the pregnancy.” “No, that’s not it,” the woman confessed. “He wants to know if I can still mow the lawn.”
College Boy
A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep out the store.”
“But I’m a college graduate,” the young man replied indignantly.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that,” said the manager. “Here, give me the broom – I’ll show you how.”
Twinkie
Yo mama so fat that she saw a school bus go by and she said “Hey, stop that twinkie!”
Aeroflot v.s. SCUD Missile
Q: What’s the difference between Aeroflot and the Scud Missile?
A: Aeroflot has killed more people.
Burning rubbers
your mom like home depot 5 cent`s a screw`
Your momma
Your mamas so poor, her tits are real.
Women seeking men
“WOMEN SEEKING MEN” Classifieds translationsFun means: AnnoyingGentle means: ComatoseGood Listener means: Hard to pull a word from her
embarising moment…
ok, well this aint a joke,
this is a true embarrising moment which happened to me last
summer on my holiday to paris for 3 weeks.
the day was very hot. we were bored we needed something to do,
so me and my sister, karren went out shopping. we went to loads
of clothes shops trying on lots of clothes and stuff. We
decieded to try on swimming costumes. i tryed on really ace
ones, adidas, nike, speedo and other makes. karren dared me to
try on this horridable costume, even my granny probobly wouldnt
wear it, i tryed it on and when i saw my reflection in the
mirror i burst out in fits of laughter, i was laughing so much i
wet myself not only that one of the staff made me buy it.
Full service company
A man was carrying two babies, one in each arm, while waiting for a train. Along came this woman seeing the two cute babies started asking the man, ”Aren’t they cute, what are their names?” The man gave the lady an angry look and replied, ”I don’t know.” The lady asked again, ”Which is the boy and which is the girl?” The man looking angrier than before replied, ”I don’t know.” The woman then started to scold the man, ”What kind of a father are you?” The man replied, ”I am not their father, I am just a condom salesman and these are two complaints that I am taking back to my company.”