“Starr I Are”

A newly discovered tale of Dr. Seuss

I’m here to ask
As you’ll soon see —
Did you grope
Miss Lewinsky?

Did you grope her
In your house?
Did you grope
Beneath her blouse?

I did not do that
Here or there–
I did not do that
Anywhere!

I did not do that
Near or far —
I did not do that
Starr-You-Are.

Did you smile?
Did you flirt?
Did you peek
Beneath her skirt?

And did you tell
the girl to lie
When called upon
To testify?

I do not like you
Starr-You-Are —
I think that you
Have gone too far.

I will not answer
Any more —
Perhaps I will go
Start a war!

The public’s easy
To distract —
When bombs are
Falling on Iraq!

A Blonde In School

once there was a blonde at school and she was in math class and
the teacher asked her a question bridgette what is 2+2.She just
sat there for a while. um she said i think it is 7. all the kids
looked at her. the teacher said no that is wrong. um she said 2.
once again the kids looked at her. no the teacher said.
ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, i donno. the teacher said you better think
about the answer all day and tell me the answer tommrow ok she
said.

THE NEXT DAY…………
well the teacher said what is the answer she just sat there she
did not know the answer for the rest of her life…….

Lonely jew in catholic school

one day there was a jewish boy who failed in math.His parents decided to send him to all the great private schools but nothing worked.So his parents sent him to catholic school.All of a sudden his math grades improved to straight A’s.His parents asked him what inspired you to do so well in math.The boy replied:when i saw that guy nailed to a plus sign i knew they meant business.

New Sneakers

Deciding to take up jogging, the middle-aged man was astounded by the wide selection of jogging shoes available at the local sports shoe store. While trying on a basic pair of jogging shoe, he noticed a minor feature and asked the clerk about it.”What’s this little pocket thing here on the side for?” “Oh, that’s to carry spare change so you can call your wife to come pick you up when you’ve jogged too far.”” * S * O * L * D * ! ” the man exclaimed.

The latest rumor

“The latest rumor is the United States is working behind the scenes to try to
find a ‘safe haven’ for Saddam Hussein. See if he agrees to step down and leave
Iraq, we will relocate him. What a nightmare, where are you going to send a guy
who thinks America is a nest of greedy imperialists intent on bleeding the third
world of all their resources? I mean, besides Berkeley?”