yo moma teeth so yellow when she colse her mouth her stomach light up.
Author: admin
Belfast bad taste
The curfew in Belfast started at 10 pm and at 9.30 pm the British soldiers were leaving their barracks to enforce it.
A sergeant in charge of one of the patrols heard a shot ring out at 9.35 pm.
He soon discovered that Private Connolly had shot a man.
‘It’s only 9.35 pm,’ roared the sergeant. ‘Why did you shoot him?’
‘I know that man,’ said Private Connolly, ‘I know where he lives. He would never have got home by 10 o’clock.’
Golf Balls
A young man, who worked at a driving range, picked up a couple of dozen old balls one day and took them home with him, stuffing them into his pants pockets.
On the bus on his way home, an elderly old lady sat down next to him, so he had to scrunch them up to make room for her. He noticed after a while the lady was glancing sideways toward his pockets. A bit embarrassed, he said to the lady, “It`s all right ma`am, they`re just golf balls.”
She nodded and smiled sympathetically and a few moments later said, “Tell me – is that something like tennis elbow?”
In a Leipzig elevator:
Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.
Bill Gates
Q:what is the difference between Bill Gates and a viberator?
A:a viberator is an artificial dick!
Reusing
How do you reuse a condom??
Turn it inside out and shake the fuck out of it.
yeast
Yo mama is so poor the last time she made bread was when she had a Yeast infection
Evening of bridge
Shortly after being assigned to a new base, a Lieutenant and his wife were invited to the Colonel’s home for an evening of bridge.
The Lieutenant was partnered with the Colonel’s wife and vice versa. After many hands, the Lieutenant excused himself to use the toilet, but accidentally left the door ajar.
When the sound of splashing echoed through the family room, his wife was greatly embarrassed and attempted to apologize, to which the Colonel’s wife smiled demurely, “Don’t worry about it, this is the first time all evening that I’ve been able to tell what he has in his hand.”
Furniture
There were these two ovaries and they were cleaning their house when they heard a knock at the door.
“I’ll get the door.” says the first ovary.
She looks out the peep hole and says, “Did you order furniture?”
“No, why?” askes the other ovary.
“Because there are two nuts at the door trying to shove in an organ!”
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by Glaci
Inner Peace Through Materialism.
Inner Peace Through Materialism.
Bugs
what do you call a bug that bugs you a buger
Whats the mexican word for
Whats the mexican word for Rodney King?
– Pinata