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Bedpan

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A young man visited his sister who was married to a farmer in a poor district of the country.

Since there were limited accommodations, he was required to sleep with his young nephew.

When the young man came into the bedroom, he saw the little boy kneeling at the side of the bed with his head bowed. Thinking this was the child’s religious upbringing, he decided to present a good example and kneeled at the other side of the bed with his head bowed.

The child looked up and said, “Whatcha doin’?”

“Why, the same thing you’re doing”, replied the uncle.

“Ma’s gonna be mad”, said the boy.

“The bedpan�s on this side”.

Mariah Carey was

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Mariah Carey was one of the first celebrities to comment on the death of the King of Jordan. Mariah told CNN “I’m inconsolable at the present time, I was a very good friend of Jordan, he was probably the greatest basketball player this country has ever seen, we will never see his like again”. When told by reporters that it was King Hussein of Jordan who had died and not Michael Jordan, Mariah was then led away by her security in a state of “confusion”.

A swimming blonde

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There was a blonde, burnette, and a redhead were stranded on an island. they figured out that the island was 100 meters from the shore. The burnette thought she could swim there, so she swam 15 meters and then got tired and sank.
The red head also tried to swim there, but only got to 17 meters before she got tired and sank.
The blonde also swam. She swam FIFTY meters before she got tired. After she got tired, she swam the 50 meters back to the island.

Johnny married?

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Little Johnny is seven years old and is sitting at the dinner table with his parents.

Suddenly he announces, “Me and Janie are going to get married!”

“Oh?” Says the mother, “and how old is Janie?”

“Five,” replies the boy.

“Well,” says the father, “what are you going to do for money?”

“I get fifteen cents a week allowance,” says Johnny, “and Janie gets ten cents. We figured if we put it together we would be okay.”

“I see, “says the father. “But what are you going to do if you have children?”

“Well,” says Johnny, “so far we have been lucky.”

Submitted by Glaci
Edited by Curtis

The stir of the town!

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It was the stir of the town when an 80 year old man married a 20 year old girl. After a year she went into the hospital to give birth. The nurse came out to congratulate the fellow saying, “This is amazing. How do you do it at your age?”
He answered, ” You’ve got to keep that old motor running.”

The following year she gave birth again. The same nurse said, “You really are amazing. How do you do it?”
He again said, “You’ve got to keep the old motor running.”

The same thing happened the next year. The nurse said, “You must be quite a man.”
He responded, “You’ve got to keep that old motor running.”

The nurse then said, “Well, you had better change the oil.
This one’s black!”