Author: admin

En un bus a la hora que va m�s lleno, la gente va como sardinas en lata y una chica le dice a un tipo:

“Por favor, �se podr�a apartar un poco? Tiene usted algo duro dentro del pantal�n que me est� apretando el muslo.”

“Oh, perd�n, es que llevo el sobre con mi paga…” Y la chica le contesta:

“Usted debe tener un trabajo muy bueno, porque le han aumentado el sueldo como tres veces desde la �ltima parada.”

A cat dies and goes to heaven. God meets him at the gate and says, ‘You have been a good cat all these years. You can have anything you desire, all you have to do is ask.’Well,’ said the cat, ‘I lived all my life on a farm and had to sleep on hardwood floors.”Say no more,’ says God and instantly a fluffy pillow appears.A few days later, six mice are killed in a tragic accident and they go to heaven. God meets them at the gate with the same offer he made to the cat.’All our life,’ the mice say, ‘we’ve had to run. Cats, dogs, women with brooms have chased us. If we had roller skates, we wouldn’t have to run any more.’God says he can take care of it and, instantly, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful pair of tiny roller skates. A week later God checks on the cat, which is asleep on its pillow. God gently nudges him awake and asks, ‘How are you doing? Are you happy here?”Never been happier,’ says the cat, stretching and yawning. ‘And those meals on wheels you’ve been sending over are great.’

One day a women walked into a plastic surgens office and
told him she needed a face lift. the plastic surgeon stood up
and grabbed a giant clip out of his cabinet.
“this is my new invention,” he said,”every day pull up the
skin on your face and clip it on the back of your head with this
until your face has the amount of youthfullness you want. do
not clip up too much skin, mind you, or you will have some
difficulties.”
“Oh thank you!” the woman said as she payed for her face
lift clip.
two weeks later the plastic sergeon received a call.
“Hello? docter?”it was the woman.
“Why hello there Mrs.Clampton! how is the clip working out
for you? have you called to praise me about my genious?”
“Well not exactly…”
“What’s wrong?”
“Well,”started the woman,”it was all going great for the
first couple of days,but now…”
“Go on…”urged the docter.
“Well, I can’t see now because my breasts are where my eyes
are supposed to be,and i’m not too sure about this go-t.”

Estaba el Creador repartiendo las enfermedades en todo el cuerpo:

“Hepatitis… te vas al h�gado; laringitis… te vas a la faringe; migra�a… te vas a la cabeza”.

En eso que llega el SIDA corriendo y se quiere meter a la fila, entonces todas las dem�s enfermedades comienzan a gritar:

“�A la cola, a la cola!”