Yours Fun Portal !
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Sinatra!
Sinatra who?
Sinatra be a law!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Sinbad!
Sinbad who?
Sinbad and you’ll never get to heaven!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Sizzle!
Sizzle who?
Sizzle hurt me more than it will hurt you!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Soda!
Soda who?
Soda you!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Sofia!
Sofia who?
Sofia me, I’m hungry!
A kindergartener was sitting at his desk making funny faces at
anyone that would watch.
The teacher came by and saw what he was doing and said calmly,
“Billy you had better stop doing that, your face might stick
that way.”
Billy stared back just as calmly and said in reply, “I guess you
learned the hard way.”
Q. Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
A. To see what was on the other side.
Q. Why do men always want their brides to wear white?
A. Because they want their dish washer to match their fridge and stove.
Farmer Joe decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to
take the trucking company responsible for the accident to court. In court
the trucking company’s fancy lawyer was questioning farmer Joe.
“Didn’t you say at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine’?” Asked the
lawyer.
Farmer Joe responded, “Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I had just
loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the…”
“I didn’t ask for any details,” The lawyer interrupted, “Just answer the
question. Did you not say at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine!’?”
Farmer Joe said, “Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was
driving down the road…”
The lawyer interrupted again and said, “Judge, I am trying to establish
the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the highway
patrolman on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the
accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please
tell him to simply answer the question.”
By this time the judge was fairly interested in Farmer Joe’s answer and
said to the lawyer, “I’d like to hear what he has to say.”
Joe thanked the Judge and proceeded, “Well, as I was saying, I had just
loaded Bessie into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when
this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck
right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into
the other. I was hurting real bad and didn’t want to move. However, I
could hear ol’ Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible
shape just by her groans. Shortly after the accident a highway patrolman
came on the scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went
over to her. After he looked at her, he took out his gun and shot her
between the eyes. Then the Patrolman came across the road with his gun in
his hand and looked at me.” He said, “Your mule was in such bad shape I
had to shoot her. How are you feeling?”
Medieval Pick-Up Lines
“Hey, Princess, you wouldn’t happen to know where a lonely knight could
scabbard his sword, would you?”
“Been there, slain that.”
“Your hovel or mine?”
“Pardon me, madam, but wouldeth thou like to see my longsword in action?”
“Every second of every hour of every day is like a thousand knives of fire
stabbing me in the heart. I long for thee incessantly, so much that mine
Sorrow seems without surcease. My alliteration is small comfort next to
the warm gaze of thine azure eyes. I crave the comfort of thine embrace
like some lost child cold and alone in the dark… So, you wanna fuck???”
An American received a fax from the brother of his good friend in China saying that he had had a serious accident and was in the hospital. The American immediately flew to Beijing to be by his friend’s side at his time of need.
As he was standing next to his bed, the Chinese said in a very excited voice “CHU CHEE CHEN …… CHU CHEE CHEN …. CHU CHEE CHEN” and finally passed away.
Very puzzled by his friend’s final words he went to the Brother and asked, what does CHU CHEE CHEN (whatever)means. With tears in his eyes, the brother replied:- “‘He was saying : Take your foot off the oxygen hose!'”
There was a burnette, red head, and a blonde. One night they were running from the cops. So the burnette said lets go hide in thoses potato sacks. So they jumped in them. Then the cops came. One cop said let`s go look in those sacks, so they did. First it was the burnette`s sack. she said WOOF! WOOF! Oh it`s just a dog said a cop. Then it was the red head`s turn. She said MEOW! Oh it`s just a cat said a cop. Fanilly it was the blonde`s turn. she said POTATO! POTATO!
Three women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead, die and are at
the Pearly Gates. St. Peters tells them that if they want to
enter Heaven, they need to walk up stairs that have one hundred
steps and that on each step, they’ll be told a joke. If they
laugh, they’re immediately sent to Hell.
So the brunette goes and on the third step, she cracks up
because of the joke.
Then the redhead goes and is able to control herself until the
thirteenth step, but then cracks up too.
It is the blonde’s turn. She goes up every step and listens to
the jokes without laughing. St. Peters is amazed and decides to
give her a boring joke for the last step to see what will
happen. So she hears the joke and cracks up.
Before sending her to Hell, St. Peters asks her why she laughed
at the very last step with a joke so boring and she simply
answers, “Well, I just understood the joke from the first
step!!!”
You should not attempt these things during an actual exam. The following is meant for entertainment purposes only.16. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don’t know one, make one up! For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.
Three women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their love lives.
One woman said, “I call my husband the dentist. Nobody can drill like he does.”
The second woman giggled and confessed, “I call my husband the miner because of his incredible shaft.”
The third woman quietly sipped her whiskey until her friend asked, “Say, what do you call your husband?”
She frowned and said, “The postman.”
“Why the postman?”
“Because he always delivers late, and half the time it’s in the wrong box.”