Why did the boy bring a shunk to show and tell?
To show smell
Author: admin
Last boy scout
This is an extract of an American National Public Radio interview between a female broadcaster and a US Army Lieutenant-General about sponsoring a Boy Scout Troop on his military installation.
Interviewer: `So, LT-G, what are you going to do with these young boys on their adventure holiday?’
LT-G: `We’re going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery and shooting. ‘
Interviewer: ‘Shooting! That’s a bit irresponsible, isn’t it?’
LT-G: ‘I don’t see why; they’ll be properly supervised on the range.’
Interviewer: `Don’t you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?’
LT-G: `I don’t see how – we will be teaching them proper range discipline before they even touch a firearm.’
Interviewer: ‘But you’re equipping them to become violent killers. ‘
LT-G: ‘Well, you’re equipped to be a prostitute, but you’re not one, are you?’
Knock KnockWho’s there?Zaire!Zaire who?Zaire air
Knock KnockWho’s there?Zaire!Zaire who?Zaire air is polluted!
Army general at Christmas
What does an army general kiss under at christmas?
Missile toe
What would it be like
Timmy:Hey you know what i found out yesterday!!
Tom:What Timmy?
Timmy:if you jerk off with your left hand its like a whole new person!!
Tom:(laughs) YEAH, A RETARDED PERSON!!!!
hahahahaha
Off to Las Vegas
A man came home from work one day to find his wife sitting on the front porch with her bags packed.
He asked her where she was going, and she replied, “I’m going to Las Vegas.”
He questioned her as to why she was going, and she told him “I just found out that I can make $400.00 a night doing what I give you for free.”
He pondered that for a while, went into the house, packed his bags and returned to the porch and his wife.
She said, “And just where do you think you are going?”
He replied, “I’m going, too.”
“Why?” she asked.
He said, “I want to see how you are going to live on $800.00 a year.”
Submitted by Admin
Edited by Curtis
Fun things to do on the first day of class
This is for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you do any of these things on the first day of class or for that matter, on any day of class.11. Ask whether the first chapter will be on the test. If the professor says no, rip the pages out of your textbook. 12. Become entranced with your first physics lecture, and declare your intention to pursue a career in measurements and units. 13. Sing your questions. 14. Speak only in rhymes and hum the Underdog theme. 15. When the professor calls roll, after each name scream “THAT’S MEEEEE! Oh, no, sorry.” 16. Insist in a Southern drawl that your name really is Wuchen Li. If you actually are Chinese, insist that your name is Vladimir Fernandez O’Reilly. 17. Page through the textbook scratching each picture and sniffing it.18. Wear your pajamas. Pretend not to notice that you’ve done so. 19. Hold up a piece of paper that says in large letters “CHECK YOUR FLY”. 20. Inform the class that you are Belgian royalty, and have a friend bang cymbals together whenever your name is spoken.
Torie nd neumann r da bestest
omg this wun tyme i farted nd it like smelt horrible nd then like a squirril came nd smelt it nd then it sufficated nd then it died
R*I*P-squirel muffins
made by***T&N***
If you see a man
If you see a man approaching you with the obvious intent of doing you good, you should run for your life.
Yo mama is so hairy
Yo mama so hairy Bigfoot is taking her picture!
Golf Genie
A husband and wife, out enjoying a round of golf, were
about to tee off on the third hole, which was lined with
beautiful homes. The wife hit her shot and the ball began
to slice – her shot was headed directly at a very large
plate glass window. Much to her surprise, the ball smashed
through the window and shattered it into a million pieces.
They felt compelled to see what damage was done and drove
off to see what happened. When they peeked inside the
house, they found no one there. The husband called out and
no one answered. Upon further investigation, they saw a
small gentleman sitting on the couch with a turban on his
head.
The wife asked the man, “Do you live here?”
“No, someone just hit a ball through the window, knocked
over the vase you see there, freeing me from that little
bottle. I am so grateful!” he answered.
The wife asked, “Are you a genie?”
“Oh, why yes I am. In fact, I am so grateful I will grant
you two wishes, and the third I will keep for myself,” the
man replied.
The husband and wife agreed on two wishes – one was for a
scratch handicap for the husband, to which the wife readily
agreed. The other was for an income of $1,000,000 per year
forever.
The genie nodded his head and said, “Done!”
The genie now said, “For my wish, I would like to have my
way with your wife. I have not been with a woman for many
years, and after all, I made you a scratch golfer and a
millionaire.”
The husband and wife agreed.
After the genie and wife were finished, the genie asked the
wife, “How long have you been married?”
To which she responded, “Three years.”
The genie then asked, “How old is your husband?”
To which she replied, “31 years old”
The genie then asked, “And how long has he believed in this
genie crap?”
Clean hippo
Why do Hippos have sex in the water?
You try to keep 90lbs of pussy wet