Author: admin

A police officer, though scheduled for all-night duty at the station, was
relieved of duty early and arrived home four hours ahead of schedule, at 2 in
the morning. Not wanting to wake his wife, he undressed in the dark, crept into
the bedroom and started to climb into bed. Just then, his wife sleepily sat up
and said, “Mike, dearest, would you go down to the all-night drug store on the
next block and get me some aspirin? I’ve got a splitting headache.”
“Certainly, honey,” he said, and feeling his way across the dark room, he got
dressed and walked over to the drug store.
As he arrived, the pharmacist looked up in surprise, “Say,” said the
druggist, “I know you – aren’t you a policeman? Officer Fenwick, right?”
“Yeah, so?” said the officer.
“Well what the heck are you doing all dressed up like the Fire Chief?”

A young couple with a box of condoms proceeded to do the wild thing. When they were finished, she discovered that there were only six condoms remaining in the box of 12, so she asked him, “What happened to the other five condoms?”

His nervous reply was, “Er, I masturbated with them.”

Later, she then approached her male confidant friend, told him the story, and then asked him, “Have you ever done that?”

“Yeah, once or twice,” he told her.

“You mean you’ve actually masturbated with a condom before?” she asked.

“Oh,” he said, “I thought you were asking if I’d ever lied to my girlfriend.”