Author: admin

POLISH MEDICAL TERMNINOLOGY FOR THE LAYMAN

artery- the study of fine painting
barium- what you do when the patient dies
beneign – what you are after you are eight
cesarean section- a district in Rome
colic- a sheep dog
congenital – friendly
dilate – to live long
fester – quicker
G.I. series – baseball game between soldiers
hangnail – coat hook
medical staff – a doctors cane
minor operation – coal digger
morbid – a higher offer
nitrate – lower than the day rate
node – was aware of
organic – church musician
out-patient – a person who has fainted
post-operative – a letter carrier
protein – in favor of young people
secretion – hiding anything
serology – study of English knighthood
tablet – a small table
tumor – an extra pair
urine – opposite of your out
varicose veins – veins very close together

El d�a de la �ltima Cena est�n todos los ap�stoles reunidos y uno de ellos dice:

“Bueno, como hoy es un gran d�a, vamos a celebrarlo meti�ndonos de postre estas maravillosas rayas de coca, especialmentre tra�das de la finca de mi abuelo para amenizar esta velada. As� que vamos all�”.

Se esparcen por la mesa unas rayas bien cargadas (unos 50 gramos m�s o menos) y de repende dice Jesucristo:

“Si no os importa, ya que soy el que preside la mesa empezar� a disfrutar del postre”.

“No hay problema”, responden todos.

J�s�s se acerca con cuidado al tesoro, aproxima el rostro al sembrado blanco, esnifa con buen estilo y, una vez que levanta la cabeza, titubea; de repente… �Atchisssssssss…! Tose de forma estrepitosa e incontrolada.

La coca que deber�a seguir en la mesa se volatiliza en una humareda blanca e intangible desapareciendo en el aire a los pocos segundos.

Todos enmudecen en una expresi�n digna de un cuadro expresionista, pero al instante Judas se levanta y exclama:

“�Me cago en D… No es para matarlo al cabr�n… No es para matarlo… Dec�dmelo!”

what has two hands but don;t clap? a clock

The elderly Italian man went to his parish priest and asked if the priest would hear his confession. “Of course, my son,” said the priest.
“Well, Father, at the beginning of World War Two, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans; I hid her in my attic, and they never found her.”

“That’s a wonderful thing, my son, and nothing that you need to confess,” said the priest.

“It’s worse, Father; I was weak, and told her that she had to pay for rent of the attic with her sexual favors,” continued the old man.

“Well, it was a very difficult time, and you took a large risk -you would have suffered terribly at their hands if the Germans had found you hiding her; I know that God, in his wisdom and mercy, will balance the good and the evil, and judge you kindly,” said the priest.

“Thanks, Father,” said the old man.; “That’s a load off of my mind. Can I ask another question?”

“Of course, my son,” said the priest. The old man asked, “Do I need to tell her that the war is over?”