15> “I, Anna Nicole Smith, promise to love, honor and cherish….”
14> When the priest asks if anyone objects to the marriage, the bride’s hand is the first one up.
13> The best man’s shroud and scythe don’t seem to match the maid of honor’s taffeta.
12> Cold feet like you wouldn’t believe!
11> His tux jacket zips up the back and the pants are missing altogether.
10> I’d say his sleeping with the maid of honor just about guaranteed it.
9> The cake topper is a tiny little bride and a tiny little headstone.
8> Your bachelor party: Coronas until you passed out in your underpants.
His bachelor party: coroners until he was passed off to the undertaker.
7> A botched ring exchange sends everyone to the floor to look for his finger.
6> He’s either dead or he’s been taking dancing lessons from Al Gore.
5> He started to lose that “new husband smell” right after the vows.
4> The bride is using his nail beds as her “something blue.”
3> His groomsmen keep stubbing out their cigars on him.
2> He doesn’t even wince as his testicles are removed at the altar.
1> His vow? “… to love, honor and decay….”
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ] [ Copyright 2004 by Chris White ]