You have an Internet addiction when . . .

You get a tatoo that says “This body best viewed with Netscape 2.01or higher.” You never have to deal with busy signals when calling your ISP…because you never log off. The last girl you picked up was only a jpeg. You ask a plumber how much it would cost to replace the chair in front of your computer with a toilet. Your wife says communication is important in a marriage…so you buy another computer and install a second phone line so the two of you can chat. As your car crashes through the guardrail on a mountain road, your first instinct is to search for the “back” button.

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