12> “Thank you for calling Epson. All operators are currently helping other customers. You have been on hold for approximately… one… thousand… years….”
11> “Senator Thurmond, your wife is on line 3.”
10> “Another Christmas like this, and Amazon.com just may turn a profit!”
9> “Chris White, you have been defrosted to stand judgement for the recently discovered document known as ‘The Rejected Hurricane Name List’.”
8> “I found it on the Galactinet — I think it’s a picture of how humans used to reproduce.”
7> “Hi, I’m Dick Clark, here to count you down into the new millennium!”
6> “I did *not* have cybersex with that netbot.”
5> “Okay, I’ll go over it one more time: It doesn’t really start until January 1, *3001* because…”
4> “Middle East peace talks have been put on hold once again…”
3> “25,000 zelgers, same as on Mars.”
2> “We at NASA cannot be discouraged by this recent failure, and we are fully confident that our next manned mission to Mars will be a complete success.”
1> “I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of Microsoft…”